Self-Identities Podcast

In this episode of Self-Identities, Kawania reflects on a life shaped by hardship, resilience, and survival. Incarcerated at 32 and now 65, she looks back on her upbringing in a dangerous, under-resourced environment where stability was rare and growing up meant learning quickly how to endure. Amid that instability, one teacher became a lifeline—mentoring her, strengthening her voice, and continuing to show up for her even years into her incarceration.

Kawania also opens up about the internal conflict she faced as a teenager coming to terms with her sexuality in a time and place where being gay was not accepted. At 15, she felt forced to hide who she was, entering a relationship with a man and becoming pregnant in the process. Later, while incarcerated, she faced life-threatening health crises, nearly losing her life twice. Through it all, her story reveals the complexity of identity, the cost of survival, and the lasting impact of the people who choose to stand by you.

Charmaine’s story begins in a deeply unstable and abusive home, where violence and control shaped her early life. Growing up in the 1970s and 1980s, she endured repeated abuse at the hands of her father during a time when there were few legal protections for children in Pennsylvania. Speaking out only led to harsher punishment, forcing her to run away again and again in search of safety.

In this episode, Charmaine reflects on how that trauma influenced her path and the ways it shaped her identity in harmful and lasting ways. Yet her story is not defined solely by what she endured—it’s one of resilience. She opens up about her journey toward healing and how, during her time in prison, she began to discover a different way of living and understanding herself.

Lisa became a mother at just 13 years old, stepping into adulthood long before she had the chance to be a child herself. Her life was shaped by cycles of intense partner violence and abuse—experiences that would ultimately lead her into the justice system. When she was incarcerated, she was pregnant, forced to navigate the harsh and unfamiliar reality of prison while carrying new life inside her.

In this episode, Lisa reflects on her journey with raw honesty—sharing what it meant to survive, to endure, and to reconcile her past while facing a future behind bars.

Melanie’s childhood was shaped by instability and exposure to environments no young person should have to navigate. At an early age, she was taught how to operate within the world of meth production, a reality that would heavily influence the direction of her life. Despite these circumstances, Melanie found strength in her mother, who raised her on her own and remained a steady source of resilience. As she grew older, Melanie faced deep internal struggles and profound loss, including the devastating death of her sister that marked a turning point in her life. At just 22 years old, she was sentenced to state prison for the first time. Now, Melanie reflects on the path that led her there, the weight of her experiences, and the strength it has taken to endure them.

Join Dr. Kathryn Whiteley and AJ Nutter as they take Self-Identities to a new location— SCI Cambridge Springs.

In this next chapter, the conversation deepens inside the historic walls of SCI Cambridge Springs, offering an even more intimate look at the lives of women serving life sentences for murder. Drawing from nearly 20 years of criminological research in maximum-security prisons across Ireland, Australia, Pennsylvania, and Texas, Dr. Whiteley brings powerful insight into the complex realities behind these cases. But this season goes further—beyond crime and motive—into the lived experiences of the women themselves. Through stories of childhood, adulthood, and incarceration, Kathryn and AJ invite listeners to reconsider what they think they know. Together, they challenge assumptions and confront stereotypes, revealing that these women are far more than their convictions—they are layered, human, and deeply complex.