The Upshot

• The Beckhams: a bunch of spicy bints (with Finlay Christie)

  Britain already has a royal family.But if the entire Windsor bloodline is ever wiped out in a freak yachting accident, there’s a ready made replacement.The Beckhams.For two glorious decades, Victoria, David and their offspring have ruled the worlds of music, sport and bacon sandwich making.From shagging on trains to necking cups of bleach, this is the story of the other Beckhams…Watch Finlay Christie’s stand up special, Aura Farmer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oQiTfnFNUQ Links from the pod: Brooklyn’s bacon sandwich on NBC: https://metro.co.uk/video/brooklyn-beckham-cooks-english-breakfast-sandwich-2518705/ Cruz’s music: https://wwsw.tiktok.com/@cruzbeckham/video/7452826349779160352 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Troy Parrott crashes down to earth | The funniest stories in sport this week

  Get tickets to to the Upshot’s Live shows in April: https://www.livenation.co.uk/the-upshot-live-tickets-adp1637635Plus: The BBC colleague who drove Wayne Rooney to get the snip and Jamie Redknapp’s secret alter ego for picking up girlsDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code UPSHOT at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to https://saily.com/upshot Links from the pod:Troy Parrott’s missed panenka: https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/comments/1paoohe/troy_parrott_penalty_miss_vs_twente_908_at_10/ Vietnam’s intervision entry: https://youtu.be/EIqntldQyE0?si=9MEw4Wzb-2sQyVK2&t=61 Wayne Rooney on Mr Tumble: https://youtu.be/Ad2w_WgZhB8?si=GblGv5FHHWpBpLRC&t=159 In case you don’t know Mr Tumble: https://youtu.be/jMwbHIQRVME?si=bCyD1r1CvFphHXCX&t=300 Paul Chuckle’s gangster movie: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AHwNkf4_QI Gary Lineker in Mexico with his daughter-in-law: https://x.com/GaryLineker/status/1995172259494056379 Ajax fans mental pyrotechnics: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DRss_VCkrDm Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Kevin Keegan: a series of unfortunate events

  The name Kevin Keegan should conjure images of glittering European nights, mazy dribbles and Balon d’Or wins.But for most people, football’s unluckiest icon is remembered for four words: I WOULD LOVE IT.And he’s had plenty of bad luck.He was beaten up by drug dealers, discovered Father Christmas’ lifeless corpse, and got shot in the face with a bow and arrow.From undercover gigolos to getting banged up in Serbia, this is his story…Links from the pod: Green Cross code ad: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JE8Lk2kSCDoScoring in FA Cup final: https://www.youtube.com/watch?si=gagQcslGM0t59KHN&t=223&v=xFY67LtZn-0&feature=youtu.beHis hit single: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJdW7-MnXtc&t=21sI would love it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?si=ip99jIR-GKnNQwij&t=5&v=mk87a7r0V60&feature=youtu.beWill he score: http://www.youtube.com/watch?si=1-R7l9C-zzx9NIfq&t=9&v=k6Bupc_sE4g&feature=youtu.be Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• John Terry fights to free Charles Bronson | The funniest stories in sport this week

  Get tickets to to the Upshot’s Live shows in April: https://www.livenation.co.uk/the-upshot-live-tickets-adp1637635(Tickets go on sale 10am Thursday)Plus: John Terry fights to free Britain’s most notorious prisoner, Newcastle fans shagging in the Marseille toilets, The Olympic Star whose lawyer advised him to murder a witness.EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/upshot Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee 🌐Links from the pod:Dennis Wise video for Charles Bronson: https://www.instagram.com/p/DRKU6KPjIM4/ And Razor Ruddock’s: https://www.tiktok.com/@freecharlesbronson/video/7533271684023930134 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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• Zlatan Ibrahimovic: get the milk, asshole (with Joel Golby)

  Malmo, Sweden. A 6ft 5 arsonist speeds away from a burning hot dog stand in a rented Lexus.Little do the cops know, the mystery bomber is playing in the Champions League on Tuesday night.It’s Zlatan Ibrahimovic, the cocksure striker with a criminal streak.From robbing the manager to terrorising randy priests, this is his story…Follow Joel on Insta: www.instagram.com/joelgolbyAnd buy his book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Four-Stars-Britains-best-loved-journalistsLinks from the pod: Stopped by police: https://www.pppress.se/wp-content/uploads/2001/PPIBRAHIM1-20010103/PPIBRAHIM1-20010103.jpgGoal against Netherlands: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2WsVHbD7zgOverhead kick against England: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RM_5tJncHww Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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