What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

• Extremely Achievable Self-Care

  Let's face it—we moms need self-care options that don't cost a lot, take a lot of time, or require any childcare. The members of our Facebook group came through again with some excellent, easy, no-cost/low-cost forms of self-care that will help you take back a little bit of your day—and your sanity! Amy and Margaret discuss: Their favorite forms of easy self care Their opinions on pickles Stores that are extra fun even if you're only window shopping We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, self-care Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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  48:46
• DEEP DIVE: Is This Supposed to Be More Fun?

  This month's Deep Dive series is all about how much fun we are—or aren't—having while raising our kids. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. When parenting feels like all work and no play, we may resignedly think "Well, that's the way it's supposed to be." But if you feel like parenting is more draining than fulfilling, there are ways to bring more presence, joy, and fun into the mix. Amy and Margaret discuss: Why having fun as a family usually means doing what kids think is fun, which is not the same as US having fun What psychologists say is required in order to have fun—and why those same things can be in short supply in our lives as parents The role of "flow" in fun, and whether eight hours of video games might start to have diminishing returns Sometimes parenting isn't fun. The reasons for that aren't our fault, and losing the guilt that it's not all more fun can really help. On the other hand, if it's never fun, there might be some rearrangements of our family life that can occur...and we've got ideas on how to start. Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Jennifer Senior: All Joy And No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood Daniel Gilbert: Stumbling on Happiness Mikhail Csikszentmihalyi: Flow Arlie Hochschild: The Second Shift We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parental stress, emotions, kids emotions, parent emotions, uncertainty, fun with kids, fun parenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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  38:34
• Fresh Take: Kristen Meinzer and Jolenta Greenberg on Friendship Dynamics

  When we're the kinkeeper in our friend group—aka the one who organizes the get-togethers, remembers the birthdays, and sends out availability polls—it can get overwhelming, and we can even find ourselves resentful over it. Kristen Meinzer and Jolenta Greenberg, hosts of the podcast "How to Be Fine," discuss how to approach conversations with friends about sharing the kinkeeping burden more evenly. Kristen Meinzer and Jolenta Greenberg host the podcasts "By The Book" and "How to Be Fine." The current season of How to Be Fine is all about the loneliness epidemic and friendship quandaries, from jealousy to BFF breakups. Kristen, Jolenta, Amy, and Margaret discuss: Why new friends can actually be better than childhood friends sometimes What to do when one person is doing all the administration and planning in the friend group How to make friends as an adult Here are links to some of the things we mentioned in the episode: Allison P. Davis for The Cut: "Adorable Little Detonators Our friendship survived bad dates, illness, marriage, fights. Why can’t it survive your baby?" Our episode "Keeping Up with Friends Without Kids" Hear Amy on the "How to Be Fine" podcast talking about friendship burnout Here's where you can find Kristen and Jolenta: www.kristenmeinzer.com www.jolentagreenberg.com www.kristenandjolenta.com @howtobefinepod, @jolenta_g, @k10meinzer on IG Listen to "How to Be Fine" Buy the book HOW TO BE FINE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780062957207 https://patreon.com/listentobythebook We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parental stress, kids stress, gender roles, gender equity, gender stereotypes, self help, friends, loneliness, female friendship, adult friendship, making friends as adults, kinkeeping, people pleasing, people pleaser Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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  45:46
• How to Be Connected (But Not Too Connected) with Our Kids

  We want to build a family that feels close and connected, but how do we know when the boundaries in our relationships are too porous? Here's what family enmeshment means, what it looks like, and how to look for signs of enmeshment in our relationships with our kids. Amy and Margaret discuss: The family systems theory and how it relates to enmeshment How clear boundaries create safety in relationships How enmeshment in family dynamics affects stress tolerability Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Melissa Porrey for VeryWell: What Is Enmeshment, and How Do You Set Boundaries? Sharon Martin, for Psych Central: The Enmeshed Family System: What It Is and How to Break Free Jesse L. Coe et. al for Journal of Family Psychology: Family Cohesion and Enmeshment Moderate Associations between Maternal Relationship Instability and Children’s Externalizing Problems Our Fresh Take with Gabor Maté and Gordon Neufeld, authors of Hold On to Your Kids: WHY PARENTS NEED TO MATTER MORE THAN PEERS We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, cognitive labor, emotional labor, mental load, second shift, family meeting, partners, marriage, spouse, relationships, couples, enmeshment, family enmeshment Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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  45:43
• DEEP DIVE: Does Having Kids Make Us Happy?

  This month's Deep Dive series is all about how much fun we are—or aren't—having while raising our kids. Listen to the whole playlist on Spotify. The world wants us to believe that having kids will bring us untold happiness. It's a love you've never known! Your life will never be the same! The reality is a little more complicated, and that can be quite confusing. As psychologist Jean Twenge points out, "Parents might believe that it's their fault when the transition to parenthood is difficult, rather than seeing it as something that everyone experiences." So: does having kids make us happy? Is that even the right question? Is it supposed to? Are the benefits that come from parenting different, and perhaps larger, than happiness? Here are links to some writing and studies on the topic that we discuss in this episode:  Paul Bloom for The Atlantic: What Becoming a Parent Really Does to Your Happiness Dan Kahneman et al: A survey method for characterizing daily life experience: the day reconstruction method Roudi Nazarina Roy et al: Effects of Expected and Perceived Division of Childcare and Household Labor on Mother’s Relationship Satisfaction during Their Transition to Parenthood E.E. LeMasters: Parenthood as Crisis M. Luhmann et al: Subjective well-being and adaptation to life events: A meta-analysis.  Jay Belsky et al: Patterns of Marital Change across the Transition to Parenthood: Pregnancy to Three Years Postpartum Jean M. Twenge et al: Parenthood and Marital Satisfaction: A Meta-Analytic Review Rainer Maria Rilke: “Go To The Limits of Your Longing” We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parental stress, emotions, kids emotions, parent emotions, uncertainty, fun with kids, fun parenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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