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The Therapy Crouch

Tall or Nothing
The Therapy Crouch
Latest episode

299 episodes

  • The Therapy Crouch

    Peter and Abbey Talk Long Distance Delusions, Comfort Knickers and The Return of Shabba!

    25/06/2026 | 23 mins.
    On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter are back for another Ask Me Anything from Portugal and there is absolutely no shortage of chaos!

    The pair kick things off by diving into the realities of being reunited after time apart, with Abbey admitting Peter has completely ruined the routine she’d finally managed to get in place while solo parenting. There’s also a fresh long-distance confession from producer Gaz, who reveals he took his girlfriend’s pants to LA for “comfort” only for them to be neatly folded by the housekeeper and left on full display in his room…

    Elsewhere, Abbey and Peter discuss one listener’s boyfriend who insists on calling a Leeds-to-Manchester relationship “long distance”, whether ugly animals are actually the cutest pets of all, and why Abbey can’t stop rescuing tiny kittens in Portugal. There’s also a truly bizarre internet confession involving a sex act, a shout of “Shabba!” and an Alexa request for Mr Bombastic that completely derails the pod.

    Plus, Abbey opens up about her Scouse identity, whether she’s become “too posh” for Liverpool, and the strange experience of sounding too Scouse in London but not Scouse enough back home!

    If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below
    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit

    00:00 Introduction
    02:20 G’s Long Distance Comfort Knickers
    04:22 Abbey’s New Coconut Coffee Obsession
    07:22 The Boyfriend Who Calls Leeds to Manchester ‘Long Distance’
    09:28 Ugly Pets, Feral Cats and A Farm Podcast Invitation
    12:17 Abbey’s Portugal Animal Rescue Update
    15:17 The Shabba Bedroom Confession
    18:04 Laughing With A Straight Face
    19:01 Abbey on Being Scouse in London vs Liverpool
    22:20 Abbey Plans G’s Makeover

    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch

    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/

    For more from Peter
    https://twitter.com/petercrouch

    For more from Abbey
    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy

    Our clips channel
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg
    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
  • The Therapy Crouch

    Father’s Day Chaos! Abbey Fosters Five Kittens, Gaz Burns His BALLS and a Listener’s Lingerie Confession!

    23/06/2026 | 41 mins.
    On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter are reunited in Portugal for a Father’s Day special… but as always, things go downhill fast!

    Abbey reveals she’s somehow ended up fostering a wild cat and five tiny kittens after they were found abandoned in a dumpster, while Peter returns from LA only to be struck down by jet lag & a family vomit bug. Oh, and Gaz suffers one of the most unfortunate sunburn injuries we’ve ever heard on the pod!

    The pair also tackle some of your Father’s Day dilemmas, from whether homemade cards are ever acceptable as an adult, to the horror of six-minute voice notes from dads who’ve discovered Facebook Marketplace.

    In the Agony Abs, one listener gets in touch after walking in on her boyfriend wearing her lingerie over a full work suit while performing what can only be described as an interpretive crab dance around the bedroom… and honestly, it might be one of the most chaotic emails we’ve ever had!

    Elsewhere, there’s more pelvic floor follow-up, Abbey and Peter debate slamming doors, wardrobe icks and car door etiquette, and Gaz admits what he’s missing most about football culture in the UK while out in the States.

    If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below
    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit

    00:00 Introduction
    01:12 Abbey Fosters A Wild Cat and Five Kittens
    05:08 Father’s Day, Family Chaos and The Vomit Bug
    07:35 Gaz's Insane Sunburn Story
    11:48 Father’s Day Card Dilemmas
    14:10 Dad Voice Notes and Facebook Marketplace Addiction
    17:39 Pelvic Floor Follow-Up
    20:28 Cupboard Slamming, Door Icks and Household Annoyances
    24:05 Peter’s Ideal Father’s Day
    25:42 Reuniting In Portugal After Time Apart
    31:43 The Lingerie Crab Dance Email
    38:31 Gaz's Football Culture Rant In America
    40:28 Wrapping Up In Portugal

    To contact us:
    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch
    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/

    For more from Peter
    https://twitter.com/petercrouch

    For more from Abbey
    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy

    Our clips channel
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg
    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
  • The Therapy Crouch

    Long Distance Disasters! Abbey and Peter Struggle Apart, World Cup FOMO and Bedroom Dilemmas

    19/06/2026 | 44 mins.
    On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter attempt another long-distance podcast recording... and quickly realise just how difficult it is to be apart.

    After a chaotic start filled with technical disasters, Peter opens up about life at the World Cup, meeting internet superstar IShowSpeed, and why being away from home is proving tougher than expected. Meanwhile, Abbey has fully embraced life in Portugal, from horse riding on the beach to becoming the ultimate football mum.

    The couple discuss whether they’re any good at long distance, Peter’s frustrations with communication while he’s away, and why they both agree being apart simply doesn’t suit them.

    Plus, listener emails spark conversations about celebrity lookalikes, bizarre relationship situations, modern dating dilemmas and one particularly awkward bedroom problem that leaves Abbey and Peter struggling to keep a straight face.

    00:00 Long Distance Recording Chaos03:00 Abbey Offers Peter A Makeover06:15 Life In Portugal & World Cup Updates08:50 Peter Opens Up About Missing Home10:15 Meeting IShowSpeed At The World Cup11:50 Abbey's Horse Riding Adventure13:30 Are Abbey & Peter Bad At Long Distance?15:20 Listener Apology To Abbey18:00 Does Anyone Fancy Peter?20:50 Peter Crouch Love Island Lookalike22:00 Icks, Cycling Gear & Matcha Orders27:40 Long Distance Relationship Horror Story33:45 The Awkward Bedroom Dilemma41:20 Abbey & Peter's Advice42:45 Emotional Goodbye From Portugal

    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com
    Instagram: / thetherapycrouchpodcast
    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
  • The Therapy Crouch

    Could You Leave Everything Behind? Abbey & Peter Weigh In!

    18/06/2026 | 25 mins.
    On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter are back for another Ask Me Anything episode and things quickly take a surprisingly therapeutic turn.

    The pair tackle everything from moving across the world and starting over in Los Angeles, to the relationship habits that secretly drive people mad.

    There’s a heated debate over butter etiquette, cheese board rules and Peter’s definitive ranking of bottled water, before the conversation shifts into some genuinely heartfelt advice for a listener considering leaving behind friends, family and a successful career for a brand new life abroad.

    We also hear about a listener whose boyfriend can’t fall asleep without listening to The Therapy Crouch, discuss why Peter thinks LA is completely different from what he expected, and settle the age-old question of whether Abbey could beat Peter at any physical activity.

    00:00 Introduction & AMA Begins
    01:48 Running, Relaxation & Meditation Debate
    05:04 Peter’s Water Rankings & Bottled Water Controversy
    07:24 The "Lurpak Ripper" Relationship Confession
    09:15 The Great Brie Etiquette Debate
    11:15 Should You Move Your Entire Life To LA?
    14:09 Peter’s Honest Thoughts On Los Angeles
    16:33 Abbey’s Life-Changing Advice: Just Go For It
    17:56 When The Podcast Becomes A Therapy Session
    20:14 The Listener Who Falls Asleep To The Podcast
    21:36 AI Writing Books & The Future Of Entertainment
    22:09 Could Abbey Beat Peter At Anything?
    23:21 Peter Defends His Athletic Ability
    24:12 The Hot Air Balloon Disaster Story
    24:55 Goodbye From Portugal

    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com
    Instagram:
    https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/

    TikTok:
    https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch

    Website:
    https://thetherapycrouch.com/

    For more from Peter
    https://twitter.com/petercrouch

    For more from Abbey
    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy

    Our clips channel
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
  • The Therapy Crouch

    He Invited Us To Dinner... Then Things Got Awkward | Ask me Anything!

    11/06/2026 | 25 mins.
    On today’s episode of The Therapy Crouch, Abbey and Peter are back for another AMA episode as they answer your dilemmas, share some hilarious stories and dish out their brutally honest advice.

    The gang kick things off by talking about spending time apart for the first time in a while before a conversation about restaurant etiquette and customer service spirals into a rant about supermarket managers, jangling keychains and the ultimate "jobsworth" behaviour.

    We also hear one of Abbey's most awkward holiday stories ever as an innocent dinner invitation takes a very unexpected turn, leaving her too nervous to tell Peter what had actually happened until much later.

    Also, Abbey and Peter help a listener who told someone they loved them only to have the feeling go unreturned, discussing heartbreak, rejection and why sometimes walking away is the healthiest option. We also tackle a bedroom dilemma from a listener looking to spice things up in his relationship, leading to one of the funniest and most chaotic conversations we've had in a long time.

    If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below
    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit

    00:00 Introduction
    01:55 Long Distance Relationships
    02:50 Restaurant Jobsworths
    05:10 First Ever Jobs
    08:55 Abbey's Awkward Holiday Story
    10:15 "Why Don't You Just Leave?"
    11:30 Peter Finds Out What Happened
    14:10 Honesty In Relationships
    15:00 "I Love You" Wasn't Returned
    16:45 Heartbreak & Moving On
    17:35 Bedroom Dilemmas
    19:15 How To Talk About Intimacy
    20:30 The "Shabba" Debate
    22:10 Modern Dating & OnlyFans
    23:10 Sunday Best & Final Thoughts

    To contact us:
    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com
    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/
    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch
    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/

    For more from Peter
    https://twitter.com/petercrouch

    For more from Abbey
    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy

    Our clips channel
    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg
    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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About The Therapy Crouch
Welcome to the Therapy Crouch! The smash hit podcast from Abbey Clancy and Peter Crouch. Join us on our weekly episodes where we will be exploring the trials and tribulations experienced by us, and you the listener, as we navigate our way through complex relationships. Enter into our safe space where nothing is off limits and expect some tears, tantrums and plenty of laughs along the way. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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