You’re walking down a road in the twilight. Suddenly you’re surrounded by a jostling crowd and see a coffin being carried in a funeral cortege with many mourners. You might recognize your neighbors in the procession — or in the coffin — and are the people brushing past you fairies, phantoms, or something worse? In the high heat, Chris and Simon clash on Scotland, the pronunciation of Duchas, William Blake, FFFFs, and the question of what exactly these ghostly funerals are. In a fit of summer madness, Chris even bets a non-existent motorhome against a quarter litre of olive oil for the honour of the Fair People of Wales! Our mourning duo exchange barbs over fairy predictions, the American ghost that allegedly appears once a century, and swap notes on hummingbirds, Excel sheets, and fireflies. There are oh so useful tips on how not to die when you meet a phantom funeral ('get to the side, you fool!'), good reasons never to attend a fairy wedding, and one pressing lesson above all: read Woodyard 2022,* but beware of siren Victorians.
*Woodyard, C. (2022). 'Poets, Pipes, and Petals: Some Accounts of Fairy Funerals.' Fairy Investigation Society Newsletter, 16, 17-25
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