couples in focus

Thomas Westenholz and Michael Preston
couples in focus
Latest episode

27 episodes

  • couples in focus

    Habits for flourishing relationship

    29/12/2025 | 35 mins.

    SummaryIn this episode of Couples in Focus, Michael and Thomas discuss the importance of recognising overwhelm and stress in relationships, especially as the new year approaches. They explore strategies for managing stress, the role of partners in identifying each other's stress signals, and the significance of maintaining a positive presumption of intent in relationships. The conversation emphasises the need for self-awareness, communication, and mutual support to foster healthier relationships and navigate life's challenges together.To learn more, visit https://coupletherapy.earth/ or https://findyourmatch.academy/TakeawaysIt's important to evaluate and make changes in relationships as the new year approaches.Recognizing personal overwhelm is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships.Partners can help each other identify stress signals and provide support.Having a hierarchy of priorities can help manage stress effectively.Positive presumption of intent can diffuse tension in relationships.Communication about needs is essential for resource management.Self-awareness is key to preventing overwhelm and burnout.Taking time for self-care can improve relationship dynamics.It's important to teach partners about individual needs and stress responses.Mutual support and understanding can strengthen relationships. Chapters00:00 Navigating the New Year Together04:00 Recognizing Overwhelm and Stress08:34 The Importance of Resource Management13:04 Partner Support and Communication17:17 Building a Foundation of Trust and Understanding21:59 Resourcing Each Other in Relationships30:22 The Importance of Self-Responsibility and Teaching Needs34:15 Implementing New Habits for Relationship Growth

  • couples in focus

    The Daily Habits of Thriving Relationships

    27/11/2025 | 28 mins.

    Even the strongest couples miss each other sometimes. A glance goes unnoticed, a comment gets brushed off, or one partner pulls away just when the other needs closeness. These are the moments where relationships either disconnect — or grow stronger.In this episode, we talk about bids for connection: the small signals we send every day asking for attention, affection, or understanding. You’ll learn how to spot these bids, what happens when they’re missed, and how repair builds trust and emotional safety. Because thriving couples don’t get it right all the time — they just know how to find their way back.For more, visit the couples therapy website and the online program.

  • couples in focus

    Why Some Couples Struggle — and Others Thrive

    13/11/2025 | 28 mins.

    Why do some couples seem to grow closer over time while others drift apart? In this episode, we explore the small, often unnoticed moments that make or break a relationship — the bids for connection.Every time you reach out — with a glance, a question, a joke, or a touch — you’re offering a bid. Thriving couples recognise these bids and turn toward them; struggling couples miss or dismiss them.We’ll unpack why these micro-moments matter so much, how to spot them, and what happens when they’re ignored. Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or just starting out, this episode will help you see love not as grand gestures but as the tiny daily choices that keep your bond alive.To learn more, visit my couples therapy website and the new online program

  • couples in focus

    Relating vs. Being Right — Understanding Their Map

    05/11/2025 | 18 mins.

    Why do so many conversations with people we care about spiral into arguments? Often it’s because we’re focused on being right instead of relating.In this episode of Couples in Focus, I unpack the difference between proving your point and stepping into someone else’s “map” — their inner world of experiences, feelings, and beliefs. You’ll hear real-life examples of how shifting from defensiveness to curiosity can transform conflicts into moments of connection, whether with a partner, friend, coworker, or family member.We’ll explore why relating builds trust and emotional safety, and I’ll share practical tools you can use to pause, listen, and connect without losing yourself in the process.For more on relationships and therapy, visit coupletherapy.earth.

  • couples in focus

    The Curiosity Factor in Communication

    30/10/2025 | 25 mins.

    SummaryIn this conversation, Michael Preston discusses the importance of giving partners the benefit of the doubt in relationships. He emphasises how this shift in perspective can transform negative interactions into positive ones by fostering curiosity and understanding. Instead of reacting defensively to perceived slights, partners can approach each other with empathy and a desire to understand the other's experiences, leading to healthier communication and conflict resolution.TakeawaysGiving your partner the benefit of the doubt can change dynamics.Curiosity can replace defensiveness in relationships.Understanding your partner's day can foster empathy.Transforming negative cycles into positive interactions is crucial.Effective communication is rooted in emotional intelligence.Empathy leads to better conflict resolution.Positive interactions can enhance personal growth.Relationships thrive on understanding and curiosity.Recognising triggers can help manage responses.Healthy partnerships require ongoing effort and understanding.Learn more by visiting my websites and the new online program.

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About couples in focus

Couples in Focus is a podcast for anyone wanting to improve their relationships. Hosted by Thomas and Michael, two relationship therapists from https://coupletherapy.earth/ and thesecurecouple.com, it offers expert insights, real-world advice, and answers to audience questions. They cover communication, intimacy, trust, and conflict, providing actionable tools and compassionate guidance. Each episode explores relatable challenges and offers practical strategies to help couples strengthen their connection and thrive in their relationships.
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