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A Little Bit Culty

Sarah Edmondson & Anthony “Nippy” Ames
A Little Bit Culty
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  • Checkmate: Chess Master Danny Rensch on Leaving the Church of Immortal Consciousness (Part 2)
    What happens when your purpose gets weaponized, relationships are rewritten by group doctrine, and chess becomes both sanctuary and battleground? In this powerful second part of our convo with Danny Rensch, we return to unpack life after his “purpose ordainment,” and the heartbreak of being separated from his mother by cult coercion. With raw honesty, Danny shares how spiritual manipulation, covert contracts, and collective pressure led to the deepest trauma of his youth and how healing and reconnection became possible, despite loss and pain. We chat about his wild chess tournament sagas, the story of Igor (the inappropriate Russian master with a soft spot for broken kids), and the unraveling of the Church of Immortal Consciousness as generations, money, and ideals collided. Danny gets real about calling things what they are, facing the dark side of “doing good,” and why his redemption arc is proof that you are not what happens to you—you are what you choose to become. We also drop a secret character from his book who collided with NXIVM. File this one under: complex, courageous, and essential listening.Fill in the gaps in our convo and read Danny’s gripping memoir, Dark Squares: How Chess Saved My Life. Also, follow him on Instagram, YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, X, and LinkedIn.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS: Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  • Checkmate: Chess Master Danny Rensch on Leaving the Church of Immortal Consciousness (Part 1)
    This episode is sponsored by Betterhelp.How do you go from barefoot kid to international chess master and co-founder of Chess.com? In this epic first installment, we sat with Danny Rensch to peel back the curtain on his wild journey growing up in the Church of Immortal Consciousness—a high-control Arizona collective commune led by a self-proclaimed trance medium guided by the spirit of "Dr. Duran." Danny shares what life was like growing up in a merged-finances, communal-living environment fueled by spiritual teachings, EST-style group processing, and just enough bathwater-sharing to make any outsider's eyebrows shoot up. From childhood freedom and chaos to early red flags, shifting loyalties, and the beginnings of his path out via chess, Danny’s story is a rollercoaster of agency, paradox, and hope. Expect deep dives into cult philosophy, spiritual skepticism, the lure of community, and how genius can bloom in the strangest soil—all before we even get to the chess part. Come for the cult tale and stay for the cliffhanger: part two is a pawn move away.Whether or not you play chess you MUST check out Danny’s memoir, Dark Squares: How Chess Saved My Life. Also, follow him on Instagram, YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, X, and LinkedIn.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS: Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSUPPORT OUR SPONSORS:This month, don’t wait to reach out. Whether you're checking in on a friend, or reaching out to a therapist yourself, Betterhelp makes it easier to take that first step. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com/culty.Knock out all your holiday gifting needs today with MeUndies. To get exclusive holiday deals up to 50% off, go to MeUndies.com/culty and enter promo code culty.Take advantage of this exclusive offer: For a limited time get 40% off your first box PLUS a free item in every box for life. Go to Hungryroot.com/culty and use code culty.Don’t let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code CULTY at monarch.com in your browser for half off your first year.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  • Dr. Ingrid Clayton and Fawn Stars: The Hidden Cost of People Pleasing (Part 2)
    How do you actually stop fawning, and what does healing look like in real life? In Part 2 of our convo with Dr. Ingrid Clayton, we dove into boundaries, agency, and what it really takes to step out of survival mode. Ingrid shared her go-to body-based tools—like orienting with the senses, making nature your therapist, building a “pillow palace” like Sarah’s, and giving yourself full permission to take up space. Expect honest stories about parenting and relationships as radical acts of autonomy, plus some real-talk on microdosing mushrooms, nervous system hacks, and learning to say what you actually feel. If you’ve ever felt lost in people-pleasing or longed to reclaim your voice, this episode offers wisdom, compassion, and bite-sized practices to help you trust yourself and move toward genuine self-acceptance.Pick up Ingrid’s book, Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back. Also follow her on Instagram and Substack @IngridClaytonPhd or visit her website at IngridClayton.com.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS: Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  • Dr. Ingrid Clayton and Fawn Stars: The Hidden Cost of People Pleasing (Part 1)
    What if the thing you’ve been calling “people-pleasing” is actually your nervous system doing a full-blown survival routine? In this episode, we welcomed Dr. Ingrid Clayton, clinical psychologist, trauma therapist, and author of Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back. Part memoir, part emotional mic-drop, Ingrid’s work reframes “fawning” as a deeply human, body-based response—not a character flaw—and helps us see how our most selfless instincts can actually mask self-abandonment. We unpacked the messy truth about over-apologizing, over-functioning, and why some of us can’t bring ourselves to hit “unsubscribe.” From survival to healing to what it really means to reclaim your autonomy, Ingrid’s insights hit right in the gut (and somehow also feel like a hug). Welcome to Fawn Star Academy! Class is in session.Be sure to pick up Ingrid’s book, Fawning: Why the Need to Please Makes Us Lose Ourselves--and How to Find Our Way Back. Also follow her on Instagram and Substack @IngridClaytonPhd or visit her website at IngridClayton.com.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS: Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSUPPORT OUR SPONSORS:Whether you’re chasing deeper sleep, better focus, or just some peace between your streaming marathons—this is how adults get elevated now. If you’re 21 or older, now’s your chance to float above the stress—because IndaCloud is giving all new customers 25% off their first order plus free shipping. Just use code CULTY at indacloud.co or click this link to claim your discount.Calm your mind, change your life. Calm has an exclusive offer just for listeners of our show–get 40% off a Calm Premium Subscription at calm.com/culty.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  • Joshua Paddison: Unraveling America’s First Sex Cult Scandal (Part 2)
    Think cult scandal is just a modern phenomenon? Think again. In Part 2, historian Joshua Paddison unpacks America’s original sex cult, Fountain Grove—complete with group bathing, soulmate mysticism, financial abuse, and a scandal that turned “cult” from a neutral word into a headline-grabbing accusation. Josh guides us through all the weirdness: the rise and fall of Thomas Lake Harris, survivor red flags, bitter public smear campaigns, historical cover-ups, and the jaw-dropping parallels between 1890s California communes and today’s cult headlines. Plus: why California became cult central, how cult terminology shapes survivor stories, and what historians wrestle with when labeling new religious movements. This one’s got epic takedowns, wild twists, and enough historical intrigue to keep you curious for days.Be sure to nerd out on Josh’s book, Unholy Sensations: A Story of Sex, Scandal, and California's First Cult Scare.Also…let it be known that:The views and opinions expressed on A Little Bit Culty do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast. Any content provided by our guests, bloggers, sponsors or authors are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business, individual, anyone or anything. Nobody’s mad at you, just don’t be a culty fuckwad.**PRE-ORDER Sarah and Nippy's newest book hereCheck out our amazing sponsorsJoin A Little Bit Culty on PatreonGet poppin’ fresh ALBC SwagSupport the pod and smash this linkCheck out our cult awareness and recovery resourcesWatch Sarah's TED Talk and buy her memoir, ScarredCREDITS: Executive Producers: Sarah Edmondson & Anthony AmesProduction Partner: Citizens of SoundCo-Creator: Jess TardyAudio production: Will RetherfordProduction Coordinator: Lesli DinsmoreWriter: Sandra NomotoSocial media team: Eric Skwarzynski and Brooke KeaneTheme Song: “Cultivated” by Jon Bryant co-written with Nygel AsselinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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About A Little Bit Culty

Think you might be in a cult? Want to know the signs? Join Sarah Edmondson and Anthony “Nippy” Ames to talk about things that are..a little bit culty. Or in their case: a whole bunch of culty. As whistleblowers documented in the critically-acclaimed HBO series “The Vow,” Sarah and Nippy have a lot to say about their experience, and burning questions to ask people with similar stories. They’re here to help people understand, heal from, and avoid abusive situations one little red flag at a time. Listen in as they share their stories, have frank and unscripted conversations with other survivors and cult experts, and do a deep dive on how devotion can turn to dysfunction.
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