How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation

Have you noticed that conversations feel more rushed, reactive and emotionally loaded than ever before?
It’s not just you. That’s why, in this episode, we (that’s communications consultant, Sarah Wright, and psychologist and mindset coach, Dr Victoria Stakelum) explore the real reasons communication has become so challenging: from the speed of modern life to nervous system overload, digital disconnection, and the pressure to respond instantly.
In this episode, we cover:
Why time feels faster and how this impacts the way we think
How technology affects our nervous systems and patience
Why we’re “connected” but still lonely
The one simple shift that instantly improves every conversation
How energy, not wording, shapes how you’re received
The role of rapport with others and yourself
How slowing down can transform conflict, communication, and connection.

This episode is for anyone who wants calmer, richer, more meaningful conversations at work, at home, and everywhere in between. In it, we reference:
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People — Stephen R. Covey
The Trust Technique – www.thetrusttechnique.com
Laura Lynne Jackson – ww. lauralynnejackson.com
100 Ways to Raise Your Vibration – Victoria’s pdf can be downloaded here: https://thesuccesssmith.thrivecart.com/100ways

We’d genuinely love to hear your experiences. Please share what you tried, what shifted, or any questions you’d like us to cover in future episodes by emailing [email protected].
Enjoy the episode.

Master the art of conversation, and you’ll transform your life.
From dating to doing business, negotiating a pay rise to haggling over bedtimes, conversations shape everything: your career, your connections, your confidence. But while we all learned to talk as toddlers, no one really taught us how to have good conversations, the kind where you feel heard, understood, and genuinely connected.
If you’ve ever found yourself:
tongue-tied in a difficult conversation
replaying an argument in your head for days
dodging tricky chats at work or at home
stuck in small talk when you want something deeper

…this podcast is for you.
Why this podcast matters now
We’re living in a time of constant connection and growing disconnection. Research shows that:
Around half of UK adults report feeling lonely, even when surrounded by others
Only a small proportion of our daily conversations are truly meaningful, most are just logistics and small talk
Smartphones and screens are eroding our face-to-face communication skills and attention.

School taught us how to perform and achieve. It didn’t teach us how to listen, how to disagree well, how to set boundaries, or how to talk about things that really matter. Culture often treats conversation as polite chit-chat or intellectual debate, not as a tool for emotional connection, repair, and understanding.
This podcast exists to change that.
Meet your hosts
Join two curious conversationalists:
Dr Victoria Stakelum – psychologist and mindset coach, specialising in the subconscious mind, emotions, and how we relate to ourselves and others
Sarah Wright – communications consultant, creative strategist, and conversation curator

Together, they explore how to have a bloody good conversation, at work, at home, in relationships, and in all those moments we’d secretly rather avoid.
The topic of conversation
In Series 1, Sarah and seasoned journalist Mai Davies explored the art of conversation, including:
When and how to use humour in conversation
How to handle conflict effectively (without burning bridges
How to listen so people feel truly heard
How to read a room and pick your moment
How to talk about things that matter – from work disagreements and family tensions to death, cultural identity, and negotiating under pressure.

Now, previous guest, Dr Victoria Stakelum, joins as co-host to give a different perspective using her experience drawn from her corporate life running million-pound businesses and current occupation as psychologist and mindset coach. Through real-life examples and practical tools, she shares why:
Self-awareness is the foundation of every bloody good conversation
Curiosity and empathy – stepping into someone else’s shoes – are non-negotiable
Better conversations don’t start with control; they start with noticing your own reactions, regulating your energy, and staying calm under pressure

Why conversation skills matter
Conversation is something we do together. The best conversations happen when both people feel safe, equipped, and able to bring their full selves to the table.
When we lose the art of conversation, we all lose: misunderstandings grow, resentment builds, and we drift further away from the people who matter most.
This podcast was created to help us all:
have better, braver conversations
navigate conflict and difference with more confidence
end conversations in a way that feels good for everyone – heard, understood, and genuinely connected.

If you’re looking for a conversation skills podcast that’s practical, warm, honest, and real, hit follow and join us as we learn the art of meaningful dialogue – one bloody good conversation at a time.

What if storytelling could help you navigate the hardest conversations of your life?
In this episode, we're joined by Chris Adriaanse, author of To The Heart of Difficult Conversations - a beautifully poignant anthology co-created with Berwick Literary Festival, Create Berwick, and students at Berwick Academy in Northumberland.
Inspired by an ancient border-side plaque commemorating uneasy meetings between English and Scottish monarchs, this remarkable collection blends local history, folklore, and raw teenage insight on what it means to tackle tough talks.
From chemistry lab to storytelling stage, Chris has discovered something profound about human nature: the conversations we avoid don't disappear, they fester. In this episode, Chris shares his remarkable journey and the wisdom gleaned from working with 13 to 14-year-olds who wrote with startling honesty about the difficult conversations in their lives.
What You'll Learn:
The Drop of Honey: How avoided conversations escalate into life-changing consequences
The Beast in the Bean Garden: What we lose when we avoid difficult people and conversations
Spells vs Stories: Breaking free from the endless narratives keeping you stuck
Positive Language: Why saying what you want (not what you don't want) changes everything
Emotional Regulation: Walking slowly into difficult conversations instead of reacting
This episode is for you if you've been putting off a difficult conversation for weeks, months, or even years, and you're tired of avoiding certain people or topics because they feel too hard to address. Whether you want to stop tiptoeing around issues and start addressing them head-on, or you're curious about why some conversations feel so scary even when they shouldn't, this episode offers practical tools for staying calm and regulated during tense discussions. If you're ready to break free from the stories that keep you stuck in old patterns and believe that better conversations can transform your relationships and your life, this episode will give you a completely fresh perspective on the conversations you've been avoiding.
Guest Bio: Chris Adriaanse transitioned from chemistry PhD to professional storyteller, combining scientific thinking with ancient wisdom. His collaborative book project with Berwick Literary Festival captures authentic teenage voices navigating difficult conversations.
Links:
Book: "To the Heart of Difficult Conversations" available to buy from Chris's website, www.chrisadriaanse.co.uk

Send us a text
How do you start a conversation with someone from a different race, culture, or background without saying the wrong thing? It's a question that paralyses many of us in our increasingly diverse workplaces, schools, and communities. We're so afraid of offending that we often avoid meaningful connections entirely.
In this episode, we're joined by Claudia McKenzie, General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in South London and former PR executive, who brings both personal experience and practical wisdom to one of our most challenging social dynamics.
Claudia's story spans generations - from her parents' journey from Jamaica in the 1960s, facing "No Blacks, No Dogs, No Irish" signs while helping rebuild post-war Britain, to her own experiences navigating predominantly white spaces as a successful Black British professional. Her perspective is both unflinching about barriers and refreshingly pragmatic about solutions.
We explore the infamous Buckingham Palace "Where are you really from?" incident, discuss why conversations about race feel harder now despite social progress, and tackle the fear that stops us from reaching across cultural divides. Claudia's advice? "We all just need to get a grip and remember that most people are simply curious about each other”.
This conversation we hope will change how you approach cross-cultural communication, whether you're building workplace relationships, making friends in your community, or simply want to connect more authentically with people who look different from you.
This Episode is For You If you want to build better relationships across racial and cultural differences, feel nervous about saying the wrong thing in diverse environments, lead teams with people from various backgrounds, want to understand the Black British experience better, are curious about how historical context affects current conversations, work in multicultural settings, or simply want to be more confident connecting with people who don't look like you.
Guest Bio: Claudia McKenzie is the co-owner and General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in Herne Hill, South London, known for its exceptional Jamaican-British fusion cuisine. A former PR executive with extensive experience in corporate communications, Claudia brings unique insights to cross-cultural dialogue shaped by her family's journey from 1960s Jamaica to modern Britain. She's passionate about authentic conversation and building bridges across differences.
Key Topics Covered:
The Windrush generation and post-war Caribbean immigration to Britain
Systemic barriers and the "work twice as hard" reality
Strategic naming choices and professional advancement
The Buckingham Palace incident: intention vs. impact
Social media's effect on racial discourse
Workplace diversity and inclusion conversations
Historical context for current racial tensions
Building authentic relationships across cultural differences
Connect with Claudia:
Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen, 49-51 Norwood Road, Herne Hill, London SE24 9AA
Book here: https://parksedgebarandkitchen.com/ or by calling 0208 671 0306 or emailing [email protected]
Instagram: @parksedgebarandkitchen
Facebook: @parksedgebarandkitchen

How do you start a conversation with someone from a different race, culture, or background without saying the wrong thing? It's a question that paralyses many of us in our increasingly diverse workplaces, schools, and communities. We're so afraid of offending that we often avoid meaningful connections entirely.
In this episode, we're joined by Claudia McKenzie, General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in South London and former PR executive, who brings both personal experience and practical wisdom to one of our most challenging social dynamics.
Claudia's story spans generations - from her parents' journey from Jamaica in the 1960s, facing "No Blacks, No Dogs, No Irish" signs while helping rebuild post-war Britain, to her own experiences navigating predominantly white spaces as a successful Black British professional. Her perspective is both unflinching about barriers and refreshingly pragmatic about solutions.
We explore the infamous Buckingham Palace "Where are you really from?" incident, discuss why conversations about race feel harder now despite social progress, and tackle the fear that stops us from reaching across cultural divides. Claudia's advice? "We all just need to get a grip and remember that most people are simply curious about each other”.
This conversation we hope will change how you approach cross-cultural communication, whether you're building workplace relationships, making friends in your community, or simply want to connect more authentically with people who look different from you.
This Episode is For You If you want to build better relationships across racial and cultural differences, feel nervous about saying the wrong thing in diverse environments, lead teams with people from various backgrounds, want to understand the Black British experience better, are curious about how historical context affects current conversations, work in multicultural settings, or simply want to be more confident connecting with people who don't look like you.
Guest Bio: Claudia McKenzie is the co-owner and General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in Herne Hill, South London, known for its exceptional Jamaican-British fusion cuisine. A former PR executive with extensive experience in corporate communications, Claudia brings unique insights to cross-cultural dialogue shaped by her family's journey from 1960s Jamaica to modern Britain. She's passionate about authentic conversation and building bridges across differences.
Key Topics Covered:
The Windrush generation and post-war Caribbean immigration to Britain
Systemic barriers and the "work twice as hard" reality
Strategic naming choices and professional advancement
The Buckingham Palace incident: intention vs. impact
Social media's effect on racial discourse
Workplace diversity and inclusion conversations
Historical context for current racial tensions
Building authentic relationships across cultural differences
Connect with Claudia:
Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen, 49-51 Norwood Road, Herne Hill, London SE24 9AA
Book here: https://parksedgebarandkitchen.com/ or by calling 0208 671 0306 or emailing [email protected]
Instagram: @parksedgebarandkitchen
Facebook: @parksedgebarandkitchen