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How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation

Mai Davies and Sarah Wright
How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation
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  • How to Talk to Someone Who Doesn't Look Like You
    Send us a textHow do you start a conversation with someone from a different race, culture, or background without saying the wrong thing? It's a question that paralyses many of us in our increasingly diverse workplaces, schools, and communities. We're so afraid of offending that we often avoid meaningful connections entirely.In this episode, we're joined by Claudia McKenzie, General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in South London and former PR executive, who brings both personal experience and practical wisdom to one of our most challenging social dynamics.Claudia's story spans generations - from her parents' journey from Jamaica in the 1960s, facing "No Blacks, No Dogs, No Irish" signs while helping rebuild post-war Britain, to her own experiences navigating predominantly white spaces as a successful Black British professional. Her perspective is both unflinching about barriers and refreshingly pragmatic about solutions.We explore the infamous Buckingham Palace "Where are you really from?" incident, discuss why conversations about race feel harder now despite social progress, and tackle the fear that stops us from reaching across cultural divides. Claudia's advice? "We all just need to get a grip and remember that most people are simply curious about each other”.This conversation we hope will change how you approach cross-cultural communication, whether you're building workplace relationships, making friends in your community, or simply want to connect more authentically with people who look different from you.This Episode is For You If you want to build better relationships across racial and cultural differences, feel nervous about saying the wrong thing in diverse environments, lead teams with people from various backgrounds, want to understand the Black British experience better, are curious about how historical context affects current conversations, work in multicultural settings, or simply want to be more confident connecting with people who don't look like you.Guest Bio: Claudia McKenzie is the co-owner and General Manager of Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen in Herne Hill, South London, known for its exceptional Jamaican-British fusion cuisine. A former PR executive with extensive experience in corporate communications, Claudia brings unique insights to cross-cultural dialogue shaped by her family's journey from 1960s Jamaica to modern Britain. She's passionate about authentic conversation and building bridges across differences.Key Topics Covered:The Windrush generation and post-war Caribbean immigration to BritainSystemic barriers and the "work twice as hard" realityStrategic naming choices and professional advancementThe Buckingham Palace incident: intention vs. impactSocial media's effect on racial discourseWorkplace diversity and inclusion conversationsHistorical context for current racial tensionsBuilding authentic relationships across cultural differencesConnect with Claudia:Park's Edge Bar and Kitchen, 49-51 Norwood Road, Herne Hill, London SE24 9AABook here: https://parksedgebarandkitchen.com/ or by calling 0208 671 0306 or emailing [email protected]: @parksedgebarandkitchenFacebook: @parksedgebarandkitchen
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  • "Sorry for Your Loss": A Grief Coach's Guide to the Conversations That Support Someone Who Is Grieving
    Send us a textDeath is the one certainty we all share, yet most of us are terrible at talking about it. Whether it's supporting a grieving friend, having end-of-life conversations with family, or processing our own mortality, we stumble through these moments with stock phrases and uncomfortable silences.In this episode, we're joined by Kate Nolan-Burgess, a grief and identity coach who helps people navigate the many forms grief can take - from bereavement to major life transitions. Kate brings a unique cultural perspective, having grown up in Poland, where death felt woven into everyday life, before moving to the UK, where arguably it's hidden behind euphemisms and avoidance.We explore why Western culture has made grief harder than it needs to be, what other cultures can teach us about death and mourning, and practical advice for having better conversations around loss. Kate shares insights from her Master's in Death, Religion and Culture, as well as from her work supporting people through The Lost Self Club.From understanding why we use euphemisms like 'passed away' to learning what NOT to say to someone who's grieving, this episode provides essential skills for one of life's most challenging conversations.What You'll Learn:Why there's no "right way" to grieve and how cultural rituals can helpThe harmful phrases that make grief harder (and what to say instead)How to support someone who's grieving without managing their emotionsWhy euphemisms for death reveal our cultural discomfortThe concept of "Swedish Death Cleaning" and preparing for mortalityHow to talk to children about death honestly and clearlyPractical phrases for acknowledging grief and lossThe difference between grief support in individualistic vs. community culturesThis Episode is For You if you want to better support friends, family, or colleagues through loss, struggle with what to say when someone is grieving, are interested in cultural approaches to death and mourning, want to have more honest conversations about mortality, are supporting someone through a major life transition, work in healthcare, counselling, or people management, or are curious about death-positive approaches to end-of-life conversations.Guest Bio: Kate Nolan-Burgess is a grief and identity coach who helps people navigate loss in all its forms. She holds a Master's in Death, Religion and Culture and founded The Lost Self Club, supporting new mothers through identity transitions. Drawing on a culturally diverse background and lived experience, her work centres on helping people understand that grief isn't a problem to solve but a natural human experience to honour.Resources Mentioned:The Lost Self Club (Kate's programme for new mothers)Swedish Death Cleaning conceptPolish cultural mourning practicesThe problematic "five stages of grief" modelConnect with Kate:Instagram: @TheLostSelfClubLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kate-nolan-burgess/; Website: www.thelostselfclub.com
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  • What Stand-Up Comedians Can Teach Us About Difficult Conversations
    Send us a textEver wished you could think faster in meetings, recover gracefully after a misstep, or connect more confidently in tough conversations? Turns out, stand-up comedy might be your secret weapon.In this episode, we’re joined by Chris Head – comedy director, author, and speaking coach – to explore what stand-up comedians know about human connection, timing, and bouncing back from awkwardness that the rest of us can use in real life. We dive into powerful tools from the world of stand-up comedy — including recovery lines, comic framing, and self-deprecation — and how they can be applied to real-life scenarios like difficult work meetings, presentations, public speaking, and even relationship rifts.Chris explains why playfulness is a powerful antidote to tension, how a well-timed joke (or even just a lighter tone) can defuse conflict, and how comedy helps us handle both literal and metaphorical hecklers. He also shares practical ways to rehearse difficult conversations, build confidence, and find your voice — all without having to step onto a comedy club stage.Whether you're a team leader, a creative, a coach, or simply someone who wants to communicate more effectively, listen more actively, and recover when things go wrong, this episode offers surprising and valuable takeaways.You’ll never look at “banter,” awkward silences, or bad Zoom calls the same way again.What we learned in this episode:You don’t have to be funny to use humour.Recovery lines help you bounce back when things go wrong.Naming the awkward moment can win the room.The three-repeat rule keeps you calm and in control.Zoom meetings work better when you treat them like real conversations.Lightness can be your secret weapon in tough conversations.This is for you if you're looking to improve your communication skills, navigate difficult conversations, handle conflict with greater ease, or become a more engaging public speaker.LinksChris Head’s Books: A Director’s Guide to the Art of Stand-Up , Creating Comedy Narratives For Stage and Screen Website: ChrisHead.comServices: Stand-up coaching, comedy writing, speaking coachingCorporate Training: Available for agency and business workshops - Chris Head Stand-Up & Presentation Coaching
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  • Conversations That Get You Hired — with Midlife Career Change Coach Josh Peck
    Send us a textWhat do you do when the work that once lit you up now leaves you cold? If you're in midlife or a career cul-de-sac and wondering what next, this episode is for you. Midlife Career Change Coach, Josh Peck, joins us to unpack the real conversations that help people move from stuck to clear, and from disempowered to energised. His methods help bring you and your career back into alignment.In this illuminating conversation, we talk about fear, identity, money, confidence, and how to ask for what you want - even when you're not sure where to start. Josh shares the three conversations everyone should have before making a career change and explains why most of us are "pre-failing" before we even begin.Whether you're burnt out, bored, or just ready for something more meaningful, this is a practical and hopeful listen.In this episode, we explore:How to recognise when you're experiencing "Sunday night dread, probably every night of the week"The three essential conversations for successful career transitionsWhy career changes rarely happen overnight and how to approach transitions realisticallyHow to handle the identity destabilisation that comes with career shiftsThe concept of "pre-failing" and how it keeps us stuckWhy you're 7x more likely to get a job through conversations than applicationsSetting a target number of conversations to move your career forwardHow to choose conversations wisely and hold them gentlyNavigating financial anxiety during career transitionsBuilding your second career on the shoulders of your firstAbout Josh Peck: Josh Peck is the founder of Your Best Life and the Align career change programme. After 20 years as a corporate lobbyist, Josh made his own midlife career transition and now specializes in helping people navigate career changes that align with who they are, what they do best, and how they want to live.Running order00:24 – Why this episode matters: conversations that get you hired 02:33 – Josh’s career pivot: from politics to coaching 06:10 – The Amy Winehouse moment that changed everything 08:36 – The 3 conversations everyone needs to have 13:09 – Why money fear keeps us stuck (and how to manage it) 19:49 – How to deal with unsupportive partners or sceptics 25:41 – Why 50 conversations can unlock your next job 29:11 – “Pre-failing” and how to stop sabotaging yourself 33:48 – How to craft a narrative that makes people want to help 46:46 – Why networking events don’t work (and what to do instead)LinksJosh’s website is https://yourbestlifeuk.com/Instagram: @YourBestLifeUK  
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  • How to Negotiate Like a Hostage Negotiator - with Scott Walker.
    Send us a textWhat do negotiating with kidnappers and talking to your teenager have in common?Everything!In this episode, we sit down with Scott Walker, one of the world’s most experienced kidnap-for-ransom and crisis negotiators, to explore what high-stakes hostage negotiation can teach us about everyday conversations. With over 300 successful cases under his belt, Scott now trains leaders at Apple, Amazon, the UN, and beyond.Whether you're negotiating a deal, a deadline, or dinner, Scott’s wisdom will help you regulate better, listen smarter, and get more of what matters — without a fight.We should have titled this episode "What can a hostage negotiator teach us about negotiating at work, while parenting, and during high-pressure conversations?" 😄We talk with Scott about:Why “negotiation” isn’t just for boardroomsThe 3 types of conversation (and how to spot them)Why most of us misunderstand the type of conversation we’re inThe one mindset shift that makes you a better communicator overnightHow to regulate your emotions mid-conflict (aka “Paws (pause). Toes. Choose.”)Why assumptions are expensive, and listening is cheapHow to deal with difficult people without losing your coolThis episode is packed with tools, stories, and sticky metaphors that will change the way you communicate – from pirates to partners.Running Order:00:09 – Why most of us struggle with conversations01:06 – Introductions - Scott Walker: hostage negotiator turned leadership coach02:25 – Negotiation as purposeful conversation03:51 – What pirates and teenagers have in common05:06 – Assumptions: the expensive earplugs blocking real communication06:45 – The three types of conversation: practical, emotional, and identity-driven11:32 – When your identity feels under threat12:25 – Regulating your emotions under pressure13:53 – Scott’s first major mistake — and the colleague who saved him15:58 – Managing emotional triggers: observe, don’t absorb20:14 – Better conversations start with better self-awareness21:55 – “Pause. Reflect. Choose.” — a technique for staying grounded25:27 – The importance of practising calm before you need it29:14 – Taking ownership of your emotions (and outcomes)30:06 – How to deal with difficult people (egos, narcissists, manipulators)32:22 – Trump vs Zelensky: a lesson in how not to have a conversation35:30 – Warmth cues, head tilts, and how we signal we’re listening37:02 – Scott’s “antennae” approach to reading the room40:14 – Why better conversations start in your body (Paws. Toes. Antennae.)42:10 – Trust as the cornerstone of any successful negotiation43:49 – When the relationship matters more than the outcome45:35 – The five levels of listening — and why most people never get past level two48:50 – Why what and how questions are better than why52:16 – The power of silence (and why we find it so uncomfortable)53:08 – How to sound human, not robotic55:22 – How to negotiate under pressure — in real time57:03 – Scott’s parting advice: ditch the excuses, do the workLinks>  Scott’s books – Eye of The Storm (out 8 May 2025) and Order Out of Chaos can be purchased here: https://amzn.eu/d/5T0dasf >  Thrive under pressure course  - May 20 thriveunderpressure.co.>  Sign up for Scott’s newsletter here: https://winanynegotiation.com/pages/contact>  Follow Scott on
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About How to Have a Bloody Good Conversation

Have we forgotten how to talk to each other? We communicate non-stop online, but the more we type the less we talk, and then we get out of the habit of having a bloody good conversation.Yet conversations build important connections. They can double a company’s turnover, forge lasting relationships, land that dream job, so how can we make sure every conversation ends well for everyone? Join two conversationalists, journalist and broadcaster Mai Davies and communications consultant Sarah Wright, as they explore the ins and outs of having a bloody good conversation. It might just change your life!
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