How Not to Screw Up Your Kids

When siblings fight, it can feel endless - the bickering, the shouting, the “that’s not fair,” the constant demand that you step in and decide who’s right.

In this episode, I explain why sibling rivalry is normal, why refereeing often makes things worse, and what actually helps children learn to resolve conflict themselves.

I am going to walk you through the real developmental reasons siblings clash, the skills they’re missing, and how stepping back (safely) gives them the practice they need to build frustration tolerance, negotiation, perspective‑taking and repair.

I will share three things that actually help, and the best part - you can start doing them right now.

This episode is a practical, hopeful guide to transforming sibling dynamics and giving your children the lifelong skills they’ll use in every relationship they ever have.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:
01:18 - Sibling rivalry is a training ground
05:48 - 3 things to remember
09:37 - Resist, resist, resist
12:10 - Neurodiversity
17:18 - Unite and conquer
21:21 - Give your kids a process

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together
💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/
💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library
💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025
💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you dread bedtime?

Are you children refusing to go to sleep?

Don’t worry, we’ve all been there! When bedtime becomes a nightly battle, it drains every ounce of energy you have left.

In today’s episode, I walk you through why children of every age struggle to settle at night - from toddlers who can’t tolerate separation, to primary‑aged children whose brains haven’t yet wound down, to teenagers whose phones and FOMO keep them wired long past bedtime.

I explain the real drivers behind bedtime resistance, and share three practical things you can start doing today that will genuinely help.

If you’re exhausted, frustrated, or feeling like nothing you try ever works, this episode will help you understand what’s going on underneath the behaviour, and give you simple, doable steps to finally change the bedtime dynamic in your home.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:
01:41 - Is bedtime a nightmare for you?
06:41 - Three causes of bedtime problems
09:34 - The wind-down window
17:50 - Fix the environment
22:37 - Give your kids responsibility

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together
💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/
💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library
💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025
💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Let me guess… you spend ages nagging about teeth brushing?

You’re constantly running late?

Homework is a war?

And don’t even mention tidying rooms, am I right?

When I sat down to record this episode, I wanted to flip the whole conversation about children’s habits upside down, because none of the above actually shape who your child becomes as an adult.

In this episode, I walk you through what the research really shows. I explain why self‑control, distress tolerance, problem‑solving, emotional regulation, persistence and self‑advocacy matter far more than perfect mornings or tidy bedrooms, and why rescuing and over-helping is the worst thing we can do (in this particular instance, at least!)

Plus, I share five things you can start doing today to build the habits that matter. These are small shifts with huge long‑term impact, and they will help your child become a capable, resilient adult who can navigate life with confidence.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:
01:12 - IQ doesn’t tell you this
06:25 - Surviving, not thriving
10:19 - The habit of trying
15:36 - Self-advocacy & neurodivergence
21:09 - Resist the rescue
26:15 - Embrace the discomfort
31:06 - Praise the struggle

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together
💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/
💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library
💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025
💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, I’m talking about food.

Does your toddler refuse pasta because the shape is “wrong”?

Or does your teenager come home from school every day with an energy drink and packet of crisps?

Don’t worry, you are not alone. The struggle is real and it can feel relentless (pun not intended 😆).

But underneath every food battle is the same thing: pressure. It can be their body’s cravings, it can be developmental, it can be social, or (here’s the brutal truth) it might even be us. However, once you understand what’s actually going on in your child’s brain and body, everything changes.

So in today’s bucket-emptying episode, I talk you through the five practical things you can do that genuinely change the game between your kids and food. No battles. No bribing. No guilt. Just simple, doable shifts that help your child build a healthy relationship with food over time.

And the best part: you can start doing these five things right now.

So if food has become a battleground in your home, this episode will help you take back control of the long game.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:
01:03 - Children have more taste buds than adults
03:23 - The Forbidden Fruit Effect
07:22 - My 5 top tips

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together
💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/
💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library
💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025
💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Has homework become a battle?

Has your child stopped trying or caring?

In this episode, I’m talking directly to the parents who feel like their child’s motivation has quietly slipped away, because I want to help you understand what’s really going on underneath that perceived lack of effort.

Spoiler alert: it’s almost never laziness.

I’m going to walk you through why pushing harder doesn’t work, why rewards and consequences lose their power, and what motivation really looks like in a developing brain. Then I’m going to share five practical things you can start doing today to help your child reconnect with learning and learn how to feel proud of themselves again.

If you’ve been feeling stuck, frustrated, or worried about your child’s motivation, this episode will help you see the problem differently and give you a clear path forward.

So take a seat, pour yourself a cuppa, and enjoy the conversation…

Highlights from this episode:
00:58 - The two kinds of motivation
06:31 - The three skills in this episode
08:26 - Early years and primary school
12:56 - Middle childhood and finding a sense of self
17:59 - Autism & ADHD
23:04 - My top five things
27:59 - Autonomy supporting language

💚 Please share with at least one friend, and let’s build our village together
💚 For all previous episodes, and to submit episode topics you want me to talk about, visit https://drmaryhan.com/podcast/
💚 For the free resource library, visit https://drmaryhan.com/library
💚 Join our campaign One Million Moments to reduce the number of children struggling with mental health challenges from 17% to 10% by 2025
💚 Brands and advertisers, email contact@drmaryhan.com

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your doctor or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have heard on the podcast or on my website.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.