This Is Woman's Work with Nicole Kalil

Comparison is the thief of joy. Or so we've been told. But what if comparison isn't the problem? What if the real problem is what we do with it?

We compare everything. Careers, salaries, bodies, relationships, parenting, success, and whose kids somehow unload the dishwasher without being threatened. And thanks to social media, we can feel inadequate about all of it before we've even had our morning coffee.

But here's where things get interesting: What if envy isn't something to overcome, but something we can actually use?

Dr. Stacy Kim is a social scientist, life coach, founder of Life Junctions, and author of Envy: Why Wanting What They Have Is the Key to Getting What You Want. She's challenging everything we've been taught about envy, jealousy, and comparison, revealing how these uncomfortable emotions can become powerful tools for self-discovery, personal growth, and building confidence.

We explore:

The difference between envy and jealousy — and why understanding it matters

How to recognize benign envy versus malicious envy, and turn comparison into motivation instead of resentment

What the Korean approach to envy can teach us about admiration, ambition, and wanting more

How the SIREN framework helps uncover what envy is really trying to tell us

Why what we envy isn't always what we actually want, and how to identify the deeper desire

How social media comparison can impact confidence and self-worth

Why some feelings of envy disappear quickly while others deserve our attention

Practical ways to turn envy into action, personal growth, and meaningful change

Envy is information, not instruction. It can point us toward what matters, but we still get to decide what we want and what we're willing to do about it. So instead of letting someone else's success derail our confidence, let's get curious about what it's telling us — and use it to build a life that actually feels like our own.

Thank you to our sponsors!

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Connect with Stacy:

Website: https://stacyskim.com

Book: https://www.amazon.com/Envy-Wanting-What-They-Getting/dp/1538776715;

IG: https://www.instagram.com/stacykim.phd/;

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stacyskim/

Related Podcast Episodes:

On Our Best Behavior: The Price Women Pay to Be “Good” with Elise Loehnen | 388

UNCOMPETE: Rejecting Competition to Unlock Success with Ruchika T. Malhotra | 398

VI4P - Comparison, Judgement, and Choosing Confidence (Chapter 9)

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We've all done it. Avoided the conversation, hoped the problem would magically disappear, or convinced ourselves that someone should just know what we need without us having to actually say it.

And how's that working out?

The truth is, the conversations we avoid don't go away. They take up space, create resentment, damage relationships, and sometimes turn a relatively small issue into a full-blown shitshow.

In this episode of This Is Woman's Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with Christina Wing, Harvard Business School senior lecturer and author of Unspeakable: The Taboo Topics We Avoid and How to Talk About Them, to explore why we're so damn uncomfortable talking about the things that matter most.

In this episode, they discuss:

Why avoiding uncomfortable conversations often creates bigger problems than having them.

How talking about someone instead of to them can fuel resentment and unnecessary drama.

Why money conversations feel so personal and how to separate financial circumstances from self-worth.

The difference between a difficult conversation and a difficult moment.

How to recognize when it's your place to speak up and when it's better to stay out of it.

What to do when someone becomes defensive or refuses to engage.

Why everyday annoyances can turn into major relationship problems when left unaddressed.

The two biggest mistakes people make when approaching difficult conversations.

Why conversations about estate planning, death, and our final wishes need to happen sooner rather than later.

Having the conversation doesn't guarantee we'll get the outcome we want. But avoiding it almost guarantees we won't have a voice in what happens next.

Because sometimes the most powerful thing we can do is stop overthinking, stop rehearsing, and just say the damn thing.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Christina:

Website: https://www.christinawing.com/

Book: https://www.christinawing.com/book/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/christina.r.wing/

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195 / Finding (And Using) Your Voice with Amy Green Smith

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For years, remote work has felt like a win. No commute, more flexibility, fewer pointless hours spent proving we're working simply because someone can see us. And for women, especially caregivers, that flexibility can be a game changer.

But what if there's a downside we're not talking about enough?

In this episode of This Is Woman's Work, Nicole Kalil sits down with economist Natalia Emanuel, co-author of In Person: How Working Together Fuels Creativity, Productivity, and Growth, to challenge some deeply held beliefs about remote work.

In this episode, they discuss:

Why working face-to-face can improve learning, creativity, and career advancement.

The surprising connection between remote work, isolation, and mental health.

Why being in the office isn't the same as meaningful in-person collaboration.

How remote work can disadvantage younger employees and those starting new roles.

Why mentorship and workplace culture need to be valued and rewarded.

The complicated trade-offs between workplace flexibility and caregiving responsibilities.

Five factors organizations should consider when deciding how much in-person work is necessary.

Why predictable schedules and workday social activities matter, especially for women.

How AI could make human connection even more valuable.

The answer isn't all remote or all in person. It's about being intentional with our time, challenging outdated workplace expectations, and creating environments where people can actually thrive.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Natalia:

Website:https://www.nataliaemanuel.com/

Book: https://inpersonbook.com/

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nataliaemanuel?trk=public_post_feed-actor-name

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Somewhere along the way, emergency preparedness got hijacked by doomsday prepping, conspiracy theories, stockpiles of ammo, and a truly unnecessary amount of camouflage. But emergencies themselves? Not exactly far-fetched. Power outages, extreme weather, wildfires, floods, earthquakes, pandemics - shit happens. Being prepared for it isn’t paranoid. It’s practical.

Amy Edelman and Chris Begley are the co-authors of The Emergency Playbook: A Bunker-Free Guide to Disaster Preparation. Amy is the founder of IndieReader and Pretty Prepared, while Chris is an archaeologist, professor, wilderness survival instructor, National Geographic Explorer, and author of The Next Apocalypse. Together, they’re making emergency preparedness less about fear and more about confidence, common sense.

We explore:

How to create an emergency preparedness plan without spiraling into worst-case-scenario anxiety

The most likely emergencies households should actually prepare for

Why the best first step costs absolutely nothing: make a plan

What every household should have on hand for power outages and natural disasters and what belongs in a go bag

Why knowing your neighbors and building community may matter more than stockpiling gear

The survival skills that can be more valuable than expensive emergency equipment

How to prepare for pets, children, older family members, disabilities, and different mobility needs

Why freaking out and failing to plan are two of the biggest mistakes people make during an emergency

The surprisingly important role of chocolate, coffee, candy, and other morale boosters

The goal isn’t to prepare for every single terrible thing that could possibly happen. The goal is to prepare for what’s reasonably likely, build useful skills, communicate with the people who matter, and create enough of a plan that fear doesn’t get to run the show.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Amy & Chris:

Book: https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/781838/the-emergency-playbook-by-amy-edelman-and-chris-begley/

Amy’s IG: https://www.instagram.com/pretty.prepared/

Amy’s Substack: https://prettyprepared.substack.com/p/how-to-stop-feeling-anxious-about

Chris’ Website: https://explorationfound.wixsite.com/chrisbegley

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Domestic violence doesn’t always start with a punch. It often starts quietly, with control disguised as concern, isolation disguised as love, and boundaries being chipped away so slowly that it can be hard to recognize what’s happening until the danger is very real.

Denise Brown knows this in the most devastating way possible. Her sister, Nicole Brown Simpson, was murdered in 1994 after experiencing domestic violence in her marriage. For more than 30 years, Denise has dedicated her life to domestic violence awareness, victim advocacy, education, and helping women recognize the warning signs she wishes she had understood then. Her new book, For My Sister Nicole: Love Shouldn’t Hurt, shares Nicole’s story while giving victims, survivors, families, and friends resources that could save lives.

In this episode, Nicole and Denise discuss:

Why domestic violence is about power and control—and why it can happen to strong, independent women

The early warning signs of an abusive relationship that are easy to dismiss or explain away

Why victims may hide abuse to protect their children, family, friends, pets—or even their abuser

The hope, shame, and fear that can make leaving an abusive relationship incredibly complicated

How friends and family can support someone experiencing domestic violence without trying to control their decisions

The importance of safety planning and working with domestic violence shelters when preparing to leave

Why calling 911, documenting abuse, and creating a paper trail can matter

The Domestic Violence Bill of Rights—and the reminder that everyone has the right to safety, respect, their own opinions, and the word “no”

This is a hard conversation, but it’s an important one. Because love should never require someone to live in fear, walk on eggshells, surrender their autonomy, or make themselves smaller to stay safe.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline has trained advocates available 24/7 at 1-800-799-SAFE, by texting START to 88788, or at TheHotline.org.

Thank you to our sponsors!

To see what Scribe could look like for your team, head to https://scribe.how/TIWW and mention TIWW for your first month of Scribe Capture free on select plans

Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/work or use code WORK and get 70% off your first year

Connect with Denise:

Website: https://denisebrown.com/

Book: https://www.amazon.com/My-Sister-Nicole-Julie-McCarron/dp/B0FXYCGS99

FB: https://www.facebook.com/DeniseBrownToo

IG: https://www.instagram.com/DeniseBrownToo

LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/denise-brown-6644762

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Share the Love:

If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform!

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