To Be A Boy

Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae
To Be A Boy
Latest episode

50 episodes

  • To Be A Boy

    Social Media Showdown: Should Teens Log Off for Good?

    10/03/2026 | 50 mins.
    Join this lively debate with Joeli and Elliott, as experts Sonia Livingstone and Susie Davies tackle the hot topic of social media bans for under-16s in the UK. Discover the pros and cons of digital consent age, the impact on mental health, and the role of parents in navigating the digital landscape.
    The gloves are off! (No experts were harmed in the recording of this episode.)
    This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.
    From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.
    Find out more here: ⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠
  • To Be A Boy

    REPLAY: Josh Sargent on Social Media Bans and Online Masculinity

    03/03/2026 | 53 mins.
    Rerelease alert! First aired on 10 June 2025, this episode with our favourite feels even more relevant now that the government is flirting with the idea of booting under 16s off social media entirely. So we’re revisiting our chat with 15 year old Josh Sargent — boy, book writer, manosphere decoder, and all round legend. Josh breaks down how teen boys get sucked into online masculinity culture, why Andrew Tate was everywhere, and what finally snapped him out of it. Still one of our favourite episodes, and honestly… even more relevant (and alarming) in 2026.
    We're also pointing you towards our Push for Paternity March: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/push-for-paternity-leave-tickets-1982354647113
    This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.
    Find out more here: ⁠⁠http://bit.ly/49y19rl⁠⁠
  • To Be A Boy

    From Gang Life to Gentle Fatherhood: Fredi Nwaka & a Varied Modern Manhood

    24/02/2026 | 54 mins.
    Filmmaker, author and former rapper Fredi Nwaka joins Elliott and Joeli for a powerful, funny and deeply honest conversation about modern masculinity, fatherhood, vulnerability, identity, gang life and healing. From growing up as “the only Black boy in the world” to redefining what it means to be a strong man, Fredi shares lessons on softness, parenting, legacy and the boys we’re raising today. And yes, we get a live rap on the show...
    We know you’re going to get the Fredi bug like we did, and you can follow him on Instagram: @therealfredinwaka  @boy_by_fredinwaka and get signed copies of the book directly from his website www.fredinwaka.com although it's available from Amazon, Waterstones, Foyles and all good bookstores too. Enjoy the Fredi vibes!
    This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part time nannies.From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl
  • To Be A Boy

    Frontline Boys: What Teachers Really See In The Classroom

    16/02/2026 | 59 mins.
    In this episode of To Be A Boy, Elliott and Joeli bring together two seasoned secondary school teachers: Will in Newcastle and Machel in London to dig into pull back the curtain on what’s actually going on with boys today.
    From “TikTokified” worldviews and “bantified” misogyny to the quiet crises unfolding in the school corridors, they reveal a rapidly shifting landscape that teachers are somehow expected to fix with little more than a whiteboard pen and a prayer. Their stories are equal parts hard, inspiring and deeply human, offering a frontline perspective that cuts through the headlines and hysteria.

    This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.
    From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.
    Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl
  • To Be A Boy

    Skincare, Stand‑Up & Surviving Grief with Darren Harriott

    10/02/2026 | 59 mins.
    Comedian Darren Harriot joins us for a raw and unsurprisingly funny conversation about grief, masculinity and growing up after losing his dad at 11. From childhood depression to adult shame, from stand‑up as survival to the pressure men feel to “hold it all together,” Darren opens up with honesty and insight. We were really grateful to talk to him about his story.
    A powerful, hopeful episode for anyone raising boys, loving men, or figuring out their own story. If this resonates with you, we invite you to listen to Darren's show, Father Figuring: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/series/m002lzw8

    This episode is supported by Koru Kids, a childcare marketplace helping busy families find brilliant, trusted part-time nannies.
    From school pickups to homework, dinner and winding down, Koru Kids gives parents some easy days in their week, with vetted, trained nannies across the UK.
    Find out more here: http://bit.ly/49y19rl

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About To Be A Boy

To Be A Boy dives into the chaos of raising boys today — from dodgy masculinity myths to the wild world of online culture. Joeli Brearley and Elliott Rae mix humour with sharp takes on the policies, systems and social norms shaping boys’ lives. It’s real talk, big laughs, and a nudge toward a fairer future.
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