When the f**k did I become old?

We celebrate our podcast's 1st anniversary on Valentine's Day by diving into dating after 50, relationship maintenance and why this made-up holiday matters more than we thought.
Forget just celebrating Valentine's Day, we're celebrating a full year of podcasting! In this milestone episode, we reflect on our journey from starting with different co-hosts to building an audience (slower than expected!), going viral with 200K views and even getting nominated for a Pro-Ageing Podcast Award.
But the heart of this episode is about love after 50. We explore the three types of people on Valentine's Day (singles, established couples, and newly dating), confess how we nearly let Valentine's Day slide after 8 years together and share what people actually prioritise when dating post-50: intelligence, humour, honesty and kindness.
We get brutally honest about the challenges of dating later in life, the baggage everyone brings, financial compatibility conversations, health considerations and the reality that 35-40 years of habits won't change. From joint bank accounts (we don't have one) to understanding your partner's "money language," we cover the conversations you need to have before fully committing.

KEY TAKEAWAYS
Podcasting reality check: We overestimated Year 1 success and learned listeners dip in and out rather than following.
Valentine's serves as a reminder to invest effort in your relationship, not just celebrate on one specific date.
Post-50 dating priorities shift: Intelligence, humour, honesty and kindness matter most (men add facial attractiveness; women add dependability).
Everyone over 50 has baggage; we think it's actually a red flag if they don't.
The comfort zone trap is real: Cohabitation can lead to taking each other for granted if you're not careful
Money means different things: Safety, control, freedom, or love, understanding your partner's "money language" is crucial
We took 4.5 years before moving in together, there's no rush when you're building something real

TIMESTAMPS
00:27 - Introduction & First Anniversary
01:54 - Year One Highlights and Surprises: Viral Posts & Award Nominations
02:49 – Lessons Learnt from Our First Year
04:10 - The Three Categories of Dating for People over 50 on Valentine's Day
05:41 – The Evolution of Our Valentine’s Day
06:18 - The Comfort Zone Trap: How We Nearly Let Valentine's Slide
10:15 - What People Over 50 Actually Look For in Partners
11:29 - The Baggage Factor: Everyone Has a History
14:07 - Blended Families & Why We Had It Easier
14:55 – Our Primary Motivation When We Started Dating Each Other in Our Mid 50s
16:21 - Health & Wealth: The Delicate Conversations – Do you want to be a nursemaid?
17:19 - It Is Important to do Things Together
19:00 - Financial Compatibility: Joint Accounts vs. Independence
21:21 - Emotional Transparency, Past Relationship Trauma & Understanding Your Own “Money Language”
23:34 - Our Relationship Journey & Philosophies to Dating
25:53 - Our Opinion on Dating post 50

RESOURCES MENTIONED
• Anthony Robbins quote on Year 1 vs. Year 5 expectations
• Sunday papers article on dating characteristics post-50
• Research on financial compatibility in couples
• Love languages and attachment styles theory
• Previous viral episode: Should Adult Children Spend Christmas With Us?

CONNECT WITH US
Available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube Instagram: @whenthefuckdididbecomeold

The midlife crisis isn't dead… it's had a makeover! We explore 5 new stereotypes replacing the old motorbike-and-affair cliché, confess which ones we fit and reveal shocking stats about sex after 50. Nothing is off the table!
Forget the leather jacket and motorcycle stereotype! The Times Magazine has declared the traditional midlife crisis dead and replaced it with FIVE new archetypes. Join us hilariously dissect each one;from the LinkedIn Thought Leader to the Midlife Clubber and (reluctantly) admit which stereotypes we have fallen into.
But this episode goes deeper than stereotypes. We break the taboo around sex after 50 with eye-opening statistics: 85% of men aged 60-69 are sexually active, 45% of over-50s are having the best sex of their lives, and 1 in 8 are doing it at least 5 times a week!
Inspired by the BBC series "Riot Women" and our own midlife experiences, we explore why society doesn't want to see older people as sexual beings, what happens when the kids leave home and the surprising kinks dominating the over-50s bedroom.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
The old midlife crisis stereotype (motorbike, affair, leather jacket) has been replaced by 5 new archetypes
The Midlife Clubber is real and we are living proof (daytime clubbing, anyone?)
45% of people over 50 report having the best sex of their lives RIGHT NOW
Media representation of sex after 50 is virtually non-existent (67% say it's rarely/never shown)
Empty nesters experience significant improvements in their sex lives (48% report better intimacy)
33% of over-50s are open to multiple sexual partners
Confidence and self-acceptance increase with age, leading to more sexual exploration
TIMESTAMPS
00:43 - The Times redefines the Old Midlife Crisis Stereotype and a look at the 5 new stereotypes
02:20 - Kev's Confession: Living the Stereotype Early
04:04 - Stereotype #1: The Thought Leader (Kyle with his LinkedIn insights)
06:20 - Stereotype #2: The Psychedelic Dabbler (Emma's mushroom journey)
08:05 - Stereotype #3: The Camper Van Fan (Kath's van life obsession)
09:54 - Stereotype #4: The Midlife Clubber – We could be guilty!
12:57 - Stereotype #5: The Open Relationship Advocate (Polyamorous Debs)
14:30 - Sex After 50: Breaking the Taboo
16:07 - Shocking Statistics: Sex Lives of Over-50s
20:16 - The Lelo Survey: Best Sex of Their Lives
23:12 - The Great British Sex Experiment Discussion
25:27 - Top 5 Kinks for Over-50s Revealed
26:20 – Do We Need to Re-do Our Bucket List?
26:33 - Which Stereotype Do We Relate to?
30:17 - Creating Their Own Stereotype & Next Episode Preview
RESOURCES MENTIONED
• BBC Series: Riot Women
• Times Magazine Article on midlife crisis stereotypes
• Lelo Survey: Sex Lives of Over-50s
• Previous guests: Suzanne Noble (sex advice for seniors)and Dr. Elliott Justin
• Previous episode: The Happiness Curve & Midlife Malaise
NEXT EPISODE
Valentine's Day Special - February 6, 2026
#MidlifeCrisis #AgeingUnapologetically #SexAfter50 #MidlifeReinvention #PodcastOver50 #AgeingWell #MidlifeClubbing #Perimenopause #RiotWomen #SexualWellness #Over50AndThriving
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January isn’t over yet and neither are the resolutions, bucket lists, or existential reckonings. We take a brutally honest (and very funny) look at how our January intentions are actually going, from elusive masquerade balls and long-delayed bucket list dreams, to Dry January becoming… possibly Dry February.
Along the way, the conversation turns deeply personal: drinking habits, relationships, sex, sobriety, ageing bodies, and the symbolic end-of-day drink. The episode concludes with a passionate tribute to one of January’s most iconic sons, David Bowie, and why his legacy still matters across generations.

Key Takeaways
Bucket lists don’t expire - sometimes timing is everything.
Alcohol is deeply symbolic, especially in relationships and daily rituals.
Stopping (or questioning) drinking later in life is emotional, not just physical.
Ageing invites honesty - about bodies, habits, sex and self-image.
David Bowie remains timeless, influencing generations long after his death.
January isn’t about perfection - it’s about reflection.

Timestamps
00:53 Our Bucket List Update, The Masquerade Ball - Venice, Versailles, eye-watering ticket prices and alternative
02:15 Kev finally ticks off a 23-year-old dream and the emotional backstory involving Jeremy Clarkson, fatherhood, guilt and timing
05:56 Kev’s Post-Christmas stubborn weight and why January hasn’t magically fixed anything
06:45 Drinking Maths – Kev is drinking 50–70 units a week, 4,000 calories, NHS guidelines and the uncomfortable truth behind “I don’t want to eat less”
08:11 He is considering “dry something” because 17.5M people in the UK are doing Dry January
09:11 The over-55s are least likely to question alcohol intake, Kev will do a month dry
10:16 Jo’s Sobriety Story, why she gave up alcohol over 20 years ago, being a single parent- fear, responsibility and choosing pain over pleasure
13:15 Jo & Kev have questions for each other from a recent article
13:36 Kev asks if she thinks he is drinking too much
15:40 When was the last time we had sober sex
16:20 If Kev gives up drinking, there is a possibility that he might be miserable
18:43 Kev predicts irritability, garage cleaning and losing the symbolic “end of the day” drink.
20:30 Celebrities of our age who have given up alcohol
22:10 David Bowie gave up alcohol in 1993
23:07 David and Elvis were massive icons
24:27 Ziggy Stardust was a redhead
24:55 The first airplay of “Heroes” played by John Peel, in the same year as Elvis died
26:05 Bowie’s cultural impact, he is timeless. He died 10 years ago, he released Black Star. Was that orchestrated?
29:20 Bowie was a nonconformist; he shaped music and fashion
29:54 A recent article said 10 bands wouldn’t exist without Bowie, including Sex Pistols, Joy Division, The Cure, Suede, Pulp, Placebo and The Kooks
38:37 We promise to report back on Dry January/February

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In this episode, we dive headfirst into one of the biggest changes of our time: AI.
Jo believes AI is moving fast and could be dangerous if left unchecked. Kev? Not convinced and frankly a bit exhausted by constant change.
From black-and-white TVs to ChatGPT, VHS barcode pens to Alexa paranoia, we explore how different generations adapt (or don’t), whether AI really threatens jobs or humanity itself and why fatigue, scepticism, and “I just can’t be arsed” might be the most honest response of all.
Funny, sharp and unfiltered this is a real conversation about ageing, tech, fear, curiosity, and knowing when to lean in… and when to say no.
Key Takeaways
AI feels revolutionary, but so did the internet, mobile phones and Sky TV
Change fatigue is real, especially after decades of adapting
AI will replace easy work, not human judgment
Critical thinking will matter more than ever
AI poses risks around misinformation, fraud, and emotional manipulation
The biggest danger may not be Skynet, but the exploitation of vulnerable people
You don’t have to love AI to accept it’s here
Curiosity beats panic (and denial)
Timestamps
00:29 – Our attitudes to change, in particular to AI
01:25 – Kev admits he’s an AI Philistine, he agrees he should know more
02:32 – Growing up without phones, internet, or streaming and with black & white TVs
03:29 – VHS recorders, barcode pens & early tech miracles
04:28 – People said the internet “would never catch on”
05:14 – Home automation – The internet of things
06:52 – Change fatigue: “How many times can we relearn everything?”
07:50 – AI at work: productivity tools & human oversight
08:40 – Will AI take our jobs? The “easy work” argument
10:30 – AI hallucinations and critical thinking
11:24 – What the “big boys” are worried about
11:57 – Creativity, charts & AI-generated music, what is real
13:16 – AI avatars, grief & replacing dead loved ones
14:02 – Kev’s glamourous AI version of Jo
15:00 –Useful for the elderly
16:06 – Humanoid robots and avatars
16:54 – Fraud, FaceTime scams & the elderly
17:54 – Cold War fears vs AI panic
22:05 – The race to AGI & East vs West
24:26 – Medical AI, wearables & privacy dilemmas
27:23 – When tech fails the people it’s meant to help
28:35 – Jo’s real-life AI uses for podcasts & business
31:41 – Kev’s current use of AI and his commitment for 2026
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What if everything we’ve been told about ageing and happiness is wrong?
In this episode of When the F**k Did I Become Old?, we dive into the surprising science behind happiness and why life often feels hardest in midlife but better on the other side of it.
Sparked by a viral Christmas clip that racked up over 163,000 views and ignited fierce debate, our conversation moves into the World Happiness Report, the Cantril Ladder and the research behind the so-called midlife malaise.
Kev shares insights from The Happiness Curve by Jonathan Rauch, revealing why happiness follows a U-shaped curve; dipping in our 40s and 50s before rising again as we age. Together we unpack expectations, resilience, gratitude, emotional intelligence and why getting older may actually be something to look forward to.
This is an honest, funny, and deeply reassuring episode for anyone who’s ever wondered:
Is this it?
(Spoiler: no, it really isn’t.)
Key Takeaways
Happiness follows a U-shaped curve, not a steady climb
Midlife is often the lowest point — and that’s normal
Young people are optimistic but unrealistic about happiness
Midlife pressure comes from expectations, responsibility, and comparison
After 50, people become more resilient, emotionally intelligent, and grateful
Older adults cope better with stress and uncertainty
Life shifts from striving to being
Ageing isn’t the end — it’s often the most fulfilling chapter
Reinvention and “encore careers” are common and powerful after midlife

Timestamps
00:45 – Christmas without children & why it went viral
02:40 – Introducing the topic: happiness
03:24 – The World Happiness Report & how happiness is measured
03:58 – The Cantril Ladder explained
05:30 – Happiest and unhappiest countries in the world
06:40 – The Happiness Curve & the surprising U-shape
08:28 – Why young people are happier (and more optimistic)
09:00 – The optimism bias & unrealistic expectations
12:06 – The hedonic treadmill: chasing “more”
12:50 – Kev’s personal happiness graph experiment
16:17– Midlife malaise vs the myth of the midlife crisis
16:50 – How longer lifespans changed everything
19:46 – Divorce, redundancy & pressure in midlife
20:35 – Glass ceilings and career reality checks
22:33 – Illness, mortality & emotional turning points
24:26 – Reframing and why life feels lighter after 50
26:45 – Why comparison changes and people believe they are happier
27:38 – Gratitude, perspective & comparison traps
28:41 – Increased emotional intelligence, resilience & compassion
30:21 – “Having what you want” vs “wanting what you have”
31:57 – Encore careers & reinvention after 50
33:15 – Why ageing isn’t the disaster we were sold

📚 Resources Mentioned
The Happiness Curve – Jonathan Rauch
World Happiness Report
Cantril Ladder of Life Satisfaction

Supporting organisations
https://www.oddfellows.co.uk/
https://www.workingtransitions.com/
https://www.proage.org/