80 episodes
What we would tell our younger selves - How to prepare for retirement in your 40s
13/08/2026 | 37 mins.Inspired by a question from one of our listeners, this episode is dedicated to the financial side of retirement planning and what we wish we had known and done sooner. From understanding what a retirement lifestyle actually costs in real money, to working out your savings ratio, to dry-running your retirement budget before you actually need it, we get into the practical detail that nobody tells you until it is too late.
Key Takeaways
The defined benefit pension era is over. Unlike our parents' generation, most of us are responsible for funding our own retirement and have had almost no guidance on how much that actually costs.
3 retirement living standards exist as a benchmark. Pensions UK and Loughborough University's Centre for Research in Social Policy launched these in 2019. For a couple, the minimum is £22,500 a year, moderate is £45,400, and comfortable is £62,700.
Most people are not saving enough. Only 23% of the working population is on track to reach the moderate standard. Just 9% will reach comfortable.
2 things to focus on. Know what lifestyle you are actually targeting and work out your savings ratio.
The 4% rule and compounding are your friends. If you invest in equities over the long term, history suggests a 5% real return. Withdrawing only 4% annually means your portfolio should not run out. And £1,000 invested today, plus £115 a month over 20 years at 5% growth, becomes roughly £50,000 from a £27,600 total contribution.
Lifestyle inflation is a quiet killer. Pay rises and bonuses that get absorbed into bigger cars etc are the single biggest thing working against your savings ratio in your 40s.
Dry-run your retirement budget. Live on your target retirement income for a year. Split it into monthly buckets andtrack the variance.
Timestamps
00:09 The listener question that shaped this episode
02:33 Why the rules changed: from defined benefit pensions to figuring it out yourself
04:52 The retirement living standards introduced
07:09 The 3 lifestyle levels: minimum, moderate and comfortable, with headline figures for singles and couples
09:36 Inside the minimum budget: what £22,500 a year actually buys a couple
11:34 Inside the moderate budget: £45,400 and what changes
13:52 Inside the comfortable budget: what £62,700 covers including holidays and activities
16:14 Why the state pension alone leaves you below the minimum standard and what the PLSA is doing about it
18:38 The 2 things you need to know: your target lifestyle and your savings ratio
21:02 Tools to help: the James Shack graph on financial independence and the Net Worthify retirement calculator
23:28 Why spending less beats chasing higher returns, every time
25:51 Lessons from Early Retirement Wanderlust: eliminate debt, avoid lifestyle inflation, and harness compounding
32:56 The dry-run: how to live on your retirement budget for a year before you need to, and why it is the most useful thing you can do
https://www.retirementlivingstandards.org.uk/details
Retirement IFA – James Shack:
https://www.youtube.com/@JamesShack
Retirement Calculator:
https://networthify.com/calculator/ea...Healthspan v Lifespan - What if you run out of time before you run out of money?
06/08/2026 | 34 mins.Most of us spend years planning for a financially secure retirement, but how often do we stop to ask whether we'll actually be well enough to enjoy it? In this episode, we dig into three interconnected timelines that shape how we age: lifespan, health span, and work span. The gaps between them are bigger than most people realise, and understanding them might just change when, and why, you decide to stop working.
Key Takeaways
The health gap is significant. In the UK, average healthy life expectancy is just 60.7 years for men and 60.9 for women, yet average lifespan stretches into the mid-80s. That leaves a potential 15+ years living with chronic illness, reduced mobility, or cognitive decline.
Where you live matters. Health span varies dramatically by region. Surrey averages 65 (men) and 66 (women). The Orkney Islands top the UK charts at 73 and 74 respectively.
Work span is the one you can change. The traditional model assumes you work from roughly 22 to 67, sacrificing your healthiest, most energetic years. But the labour market is already pushing people out after 50, while governments are pushing the pension age up. That gap has to be funded from somewhere.
Redefining wealth is the shift. If wealth only means money and assets, you're not ready to change anything. But once you redefine it to include time, freedom, energy, and health, different decisions start to make sense.
You can time travel. Aging is not a fixed decline. Lifestyle choices around movement, food, sleep, stress, alcohol, and social connection genuinely influence how fast your body ages at a cellular level. Genetics accounts for only 10 to 30% of lifespan variation.
Practical levers for your work span. Max out employer health cover now. Build savings outside of pension vehicles to bridge the gap. Consider flexible working, which you have a legal right to request in the UK. Invest in transferable skills if a career change is on your radar. And if a separation is possible, get independent asset valuations before any decisions are made.
Timestamps
00:09 Introduction and framing: why we focus too much on money and not enough on health in retirement planning
02:31 Defining the three clocks: lifespan, health span, and work span
04:57 UK and US lifespan statistics, and the sobering health span data from the ONS
07:24 What good health span actually looks like in daily life, according to Harvard Medical School
09:50 Introducing work span, the 45-year trade of time and energy for economic security
12:16 Why the deal is getting worse: rising pension age, a hostile job market for over-50s, and no state support to fill the gap
16:54 The light bulb moment: flipping the trade and redefining what wealth means
21:35 Time travel is real: how lifestyle choices influence the hallmarks of aging
28:31 Practical steps to shorten your work span and fund the gap on your own terms
https://www.health.harvard.edu/healthy-aging-and-longevity/lifespan-vs-healthspan-why-how-you-age-matters-more-than-how-long-you-live- Here are the show notes:
When the Fk Did I Become Old? | Episode: What Do You Want Your Retirement To Be?**
Are you actually ready for retirement, or just ready to stop working? In this episode we dig into those questions live on mic, using exercises from Early Retirement Wanderlust by Richard and Jackie Pickles. With one of us weeks away from leaving a 12-year estate agency role and the other mid-redundancy, the timing could not be more personal.
Key Takeaways
Retirement is not a day, it is a life phase that could run 20 to 30 years. Going in without a plan for what you are moving towards, not just away from, is a mistake.
The life check-in scorecard from the book surfaces things you already know but have not said out loud. Curiosity and learning scored lowest for us, which was not a surprise but was a useful prompt.
Four exit criteria signal when you are genuinely ready: kids raised and empty-nested, parents no longer needing support, mortgage paid off, and enough of work. We are close on all four.
The three phases, go-go, slow-go and no-go, will compress or stretch depending on your health and finances. Everyone wants the go-go years to be the longest, so front-load the big adventures.
Concrete plans for the go-go years: a motorcycle tour across Morocco in September and three months training as a snowboard instructor in the Alps this winter. Starting strength training now, not later.
For the slow-go years, local community matters more than we have planned for. Most of our close friends are geographically scattered. Building a local peer network is a goal we are starting now.
On end-of-life care, we are both firmly in the Dignitas camp. At least one of our kids knows. The others have been told several times.
Timestamps
00:10 Introduction and where we both are right now in our working lives
02:36 Why the book frames retirement as a new life chapter, not an escape
04:33 Running through the life check-in scorecard: time, money, energy, connection
06:00 Curiosity and simplicity scores, and why the guitar is still untouched
08:05 The deeper reflection questions: richest areas, what feels out of balance
10:38 Our four personal exit criteria for knowing when the time is right
15:05 Where the go-go, slow-go and no-go framework came from (Michael Stein, 1998)
17:31 Go-go years: what they look like and why spending peaks here
19:59 Slow-go years: slower pace, grandchildren, package holidays and listening to your body
22:24 No-go years: connection, legacy, accepting care and end-of-life planning
24:23 Live exercise: what experiences feel most important while energy is high
29:44 What would you genuinely regret not doing in the go-go years
32:03 Slow-go years: where we want familiarity, routine and a sense of belonging
33:35 Adventures that could still work in the slow-go years (skiing in your 70s, absolutely)
36:00 No-go years: what a life well-lived looks like and who to protect
38:12 Stories we want to pass on, and how we want to be cared for at the end
Sources:
Early Retirement Wanderlust - Britain has a new Prime Minister. Andy Burnham walked into Number 10 on Monday 20 July, making him the seventh PM in a decade. We recorded this on his first day in office, so some of this may already be history by the time you're listening. We break down what his first 24 hours actually looks like behind the scenes, and then get into the financial policies being floated that could hit our wallets hard.
Key Takeaways
The first day as PM is far more dramatic than anyone tells you. Before lunch, Burnham had to handwrite four letters of last resort for Trident submarine commanders and draw up a nuclear bunker shortlist.
The mansion tax threshold may drop from £2m to £1.5m, which would pull in 146,000 more London homes almost immediately.
Inheritance tax could be scrapped and replaced with a health and social care levy. We still do not know whether that would leave us better or worse off.
The 25% tax-free pension withdrawal remains in play as a target. It was nearly cut to £100k under Reeves and could be on the table again.
The triple lock on the state pension looks safe for now, but the OECD is already pressuring the government to reform it given an ageing population.
Mortgage holders on fixed rates expiring soon are facing a painful jump. We are personally looking at a fivefold increase when our 1.4% fix ends in six weeks.
Annuity rates are the best they have been in a decade. Legal and General were quoting 7.37% last week for a 65-year-old, which makes them worth looking at again.
The honest advice: do not panic, and do not make big financial moves until the autumn budget lands in November.
Timestamps
00:00 Introduction and context: why we recorded on day one
02:30 The James Bond schedule: nuclear briefing, letters of last resort, bunker shortlist
07:18 Setting up Number 10 North and the Manchester security problem
09:38 Mansion tax: the £1.5m threshold and what it means for the housing market
12:00 Inheritance tax: scrapping it and the social care levy alternative
14:20 Income tax thresholds and a possible wealth tax
16:47 Stamp duty, council tax reform, and the north/south divide
19:04 State pension, the triple lock, and OECD pressure
21:28 Private pensions: the 25% tax-free cash withdrawal and what might change
23:49 Interest rates rising and our very personal mortgage problem
26:17 Annuities: why we are suddenly paying attention
28:36 Final thoughts: hold steady until the budget - In this episode we pick up where we left off on our epic French road trip, covering everything from a stolen jumpsuit and a runaway camera, to an Aston Martin covered in warning lights and gale force winds on the Harley. We also open up about a major life change that landed the day before we left for holiday and what it means for the next chapter.
Key Takeaways
Holidays rarely go to plan and the chaos is often what makes the story worth telling.
A packed itinerary can feel like several holidays in one, but it comes at the cost of rest.
Overbooking dinners (even brilliant ones) can leave you needing to slow down halfway through a trip.
Redundancy hits differently depending on your age and stage of life. What felt manageable in your 30s and 40s feels far heavier as retirement age approaches.
Even when you've been mentally preparing for a life transition for years, the reality of it still catches you off guard.
Many close friendships form through work, so a career ending can quietly reshape your social circle. It's worth thinking early about which relationships you want to carry forward.
Planning for retirement isn't just financial. It's emotional too, and it's worth asking what you want your time, purpose and relationships to look like next.
Timestamps
00:00 – Recap of the trip so far: Aston Martin to the south of France, collecting the Harley, days of motorbike touring, and a boat trip to the Porquerolles islands
01:00 – The missing jumpsuit saga: an alterations shop mix up, a stranger walking off with it, and a promise to replace it
04:00 – The Insta360 camera disaster: it falls off the bike and gets run over
05:30 – The Aston Martin's rocky return from the garage: a cracked windscreen, warning lights, and a locked door drama in a car park
07:30 – A last minute scare when the booked Harley is involved in an accident before pickup
09:00 – Reflecting on an ambitious route with long driving days and constant movement
11:30 – Extreme weather on the bike: sudden rain and dangerously strong winds
13:00 – Too many booked dinners and the reality of five course meals night after night
14:00 – Highlights from the route: Saint-Rémy de Provence, Fréjus, Bandol, and more
16:00 – Arriving at the villa and finally slowing the pace down
18:00 – A luxury dinner at a hotel used as a filming location for a well known TV series
19:30 – Sharing the news of redundancy the day before the holiday began
21:00 – Looking back on previous redundancies at different ages and why this one feels different
23:30 – Thinking about retirement after a 39 year career and the habits that come with it
24:30 – A book on early retirement and a favourite quote about designing a more deliberate life
26:00 – A discussion on friendships built through work and how they can shift after retirement
29:00 – What retirement might mean for time spent together versus time spent apart
30:00 – Wrapping up and looking ahead to future episodes on this journey
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About When the f**k did I become old?
When the Fuck Did I Become Old? is the no-holds-barred podcast for everyone over 55 who is done being invisible. Co-hosted by Jo Parker and her partner Kev Stockbridge, this is real talk about ageing from 55 onwards. With humour, honesty and a healthy dose of profanity, Jo and Kev tackle everything from hot flushes and shit sleep to grief, reinvention, sex after 55 and dating in later life. Plus menopause, loneliness, retirement, mental health and the art of staying visible when society wants you to disappear.If you’re over 55 and feel like life is shifting fast physically, emotionally, financially and nobody’s talking about it properly, this is your podcast. Each episode blends Jo and Kev’s raw reflections with unfiltered conversations from guests who have lived a little (and learned a lot).Jo and Kev’s mission? To break the silence around ageing, smash the stereotypes and make getting older something we can laugh at, cry through and fully own….together.It’s ageing, without the airbrushing Season 1 - The Journney Begins...Season 2 - The Search for a Co-HostSeason 3 - A new Co-Host; my partner Kev StockbridgeSubscribe to the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us onInstagram https://www.instagram.com/whenthefkdidibecomeold/Facebook https://www.facebook.com/WhenthefkdidIbecomeold/TikTok https://www.tiktok.com/@whenthefkdid_i_becomeoldYouTube https://www.youtube.com/@WhentheFdidIbecomeoldEmail us whenthefkdidibecomeold@gmail.com
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