Addicted to Recovery

This episode of Addicted to Recovery focuses on a major milestone, as Max celebrates seven years of sobriety. The conversation reflects on how life has changed since active addiction, highlighting the contrast between past behaviors and the present sense of freedom, gratitude, and connection.
The hosts begin by discussing a recent stag weekend, showing that it’s possible to fully enjoy social events without alcohol or drugs. Despite late nights and high-energy environments, they describe feeling genuinely present, free, and even euphoric while sober. This stands in stark contrast to their past, where substance use often led to insecurity, paranoia, and a lack of real enjoyment.
A key theme throughout the episode is the idea of an internal “void.” During addiction, both hosts tried to fill this emptiness with material success, money, and status, believing these things would bring lasting happiness. However, they explain that the more they chased these external rewards, the more empty they felt. Even in wealthy, image-driven environments, feelings of comparison and inadequacy can still surface, reinforcing the idea that external validation doesn’t solve internal struggles.
Instead, recovery has taught them that true fulfillment comes from connection. Building relationships, being honest about struggles, helping others, and engaging in recovery communities have become essential tools. These practices replace substances as coping mechanisms and provide a deeper, more sustainable sense of purpose and wellbeing.
The episode also explores how recovery has transformed their relationships, particularly with family. Where addiction once caused distance, selfishness, and instability, sobriety has allowed them to be present, caring, and emotionally available. Both hosts reflect on how close they came to losing their families, and how that fear became a turning point that pushed them to fully commit to change.
Ultimately, the episode emphasizes that real freedom doesn’t come from substances, money, or status, but from living authentically and being connected to others. Max describes feeling “rich inside,” highlighting a shift from external success to internal peace and gratitude. The conversation reinforces that recovery is not just about stopping harmful behaviors, but about building a meaningful and fulfilling life.

In this episode of Addicted to Recovery, we sit down with Martin, who shares an honest and powerful account of his journey through addiction, relapse, and long-term recovery.
Growing up in a loving home, Martin always felt like he didn’t quite belong. That underlying feeling followed him into his teenage years, where alcohol quickly became the solution — giving him confidence, connection, and a sense of ease he’d never experienced before. From there, things escalated. What started as partying turned into years of drug and alcohol use, eventually becoming a daily necessity.
Despite building a successful career in the city and maintaining the appearance of a normal life, addiction was always at the centre of everything. Behind the scenes, Martin was living a double life — lying, hiding, and constantly chasing the next escape.
It wasn’t until his mid-40s, when the consequences began to catch up with him, that things started to unravel. Relationships broke down, work suffered, and he found himself back at square one — forced to confront the reality of his situation.
Martin talks openly about hitting rock bottom, returning to recovery, and what finally changed this time around. From daily routines like prayer and meditation to the importance of consistency, connection, and humility, he shares what it really takes to stay sober long term.
This conversation dives deep into the mindset of addiction — the self-centred thinking, the denial, and the illusion of control — as well as the growth that comes with recovery.
Today, Martin is nearly seven years clean. He’s rebuilt relationships with his family, found peace in his daily life, and now helps others on their own journey through sponsorship and service.
This episode is a reminder that no matter how far things go, change is always possible — but it requires honesty, willingness, and action.

In this episode of Addicted to Recovery, hosts Christopher White and Max Thomas speak with their friend Dev about his personal journey through addiction, relapse, and recovery.
Early Life
Dev describes growing up in a loving and stable home in Watford with both parents and a younger brother. Despite having a supportive upbringing and no major trauma, he often felt uncomfortable in his own skin and struggled with low self-esteem. From a young age he craved approval and wanted to be liked, particularly by his father.
Looking back, Dev recognises that addictive patterns were present long before he ever used drugs. As a child he displayed obsessive behaviours such as overeating and compulsively collecting items like Pokémon cards and football stickers. These behaviours were ways of coping with uncomfortable feelings.
First Experiences With Drugs
Dev first used cannabis in secondary school. Although he initially disliked the feeling, he continued using because it helped him fit in socially. Being part of a group that used drugs gave him a sense of belonging and attention he had always sought.
Over time his drug use expanded to alcohol, ecstasy and cocaine. Selling drugs at school gave him a sense of power and popularity, which reinforced his lifestyle and pushed him deeper into addiction.
Consequences of Addiction
As Dev’s addiction progressed, the consequences became severe. He experienced multiple prison sentences, legal trouble, job loss, and broken relationships. At one point he overdosed after taking MDMA at a rave and woke up in hospital days later with no memory of the event.
Even after these frightening experiences, he continued using, showing how powerful addiction can be.
Fatherhood and the Desire to Change
When Dev’s daughter was born, he experienced a powerful emotional shift. Holding her for the first time made him determined to become a better father and stop using drugs.
However, despite his genuine desire to change, he discovered that willpower alone was not enough. Without understanding addiction or having support, he quickly fell back into old patterns.
Recovery and Treatment
Dev eventually entered treatment at the Lighthouse recovery centre, where he began to understand addiction for the first time. Hearing others share similar experiences helped him realise he was not alone.
He started attending Narcotics Anonymous meetings and became part of a recovery community. While he experienced periods of sobriety, his journey included setbacks, dishonesty, and relapse before he began to fully engage with the recovery process.
Finding Faith
After achieving three and a half years clean, Dev relapsed and lost many of the things he had built in his life. Returning to recovery was difficult, and he struggled emotionally.
During this time he began attending church and exploring faith. In October he committed his life to Christianity and was later baptised in December. He describes this spiritual awakening as a major turning point in his recovery, helping him find inner peace and purpose.
Life Today
Today Dev has eight and a half months clean and lives a calmer, more balanced life. He maintains a strong relationship with his daughter and works in supported housing helping men in recovery.
He emphasises that recovery requires honesty, service to others, community support, and a spiritual foundation.
Key Message
Dev’s story demonstrates that addiction can affect anyone, regardless of background, and that recovery often involves setbacks before lasting change occurs. Through community, faith, and helping others, he has built a new life grounded in purpose and compassion.

In this episode of Addicted to Recovery, the hosts speak with Tony, who shares his powerful life story of addiction, trauma, and ultimately recovery.
Tony grew up on a council estate in East London, raised by hardworking parents alongside his brother and sister. When Tony was young, his sister was tragically run over and lost her leg, an event that deeply impacted the family. Although the trauma was never openly discussed, Tony believes it contributed to his father becoming a heavy drinker and created an emotionally difficult home environment. tony
As a child, Tony found escape and confidence through football, where he excelled and even attracted interest from professional clubs like Arsenal and West Ham. On the pitch he felt confident and valued, but off the pitch he struggled with insecurity and fear, particularly within the challenging environment of the council estate. tony
Tony began experimenting with substances at a young age. What started with cigarettes and cannabis gradually escalated into more serious drug use as he searched for relief from feelings of inadequacy and anxiety. Eventually, he discovered heroin, which he describes as providing the first true sense of internal peace and comfort he had ever experienced. tony
However, this relief quickly turned into a decades-long addiction. Tony spent nearly 30 years using Class A drugs, trapped in a cycle of crime, desperation, and daily survival. His addiction caused immense pain to his family, including witnessing the death of his brother at 26, which still wasn’t enough to stop his own addiction at the time. tony
Eventually, after years of despair and failed attempts to quit, Tony reached a point where he internally knew he needed help. Through the criminal justice system, he entered a 12-step rehabilitation program, where he finally found hope. Seeing counselors and other recovering addicts who had transformed their lives inspired him to believe recovery was possible. tony
Tony embraced treatment, completed rehab, and began working the 12-step recovery program. Through this process he developed self-awareness, confronted past trauma, and rebuilt his life.
Today Tony has been clean for over 11 years and now uses his experience to help others struggling with addiction. His story highlights how unresolved trauma, emotional pain, and the search for belonging can lead people into addiction — but also how connection, honesty, and recovery communities can help people rebuild their lives.

DJ Ross Mack joins Addicted to Recovery to share his powerful journey from the heights of the nightlife industry to the depths of addiction — and back again.
From DJing major clubs like Opium Lounge, The Warehouse, Funky Buddha and playing internationally, Ross lived the fast-paced lifestyle of music, money, women and substances. Behind the decks he looked in control — but behind closed doors his addiction was spiralling into isolation, paranoia and darkness.
In this episode, Ross opens up about:
Growing up in Hertfordshire and feeling different from an early age
Being introduced to club culture at 16
The progression from weekend partying to dark, isolated binges
The mental obsession and “phenomenon of craving” before the first line
Why willpower wasn’t enough — even after running marathons and triathlons
Getting sober at 34 and finding freedom through 12-step recovery
Staying clean in an industry where drinking and drugs are normalised
Becoming reliable, consistent and successful in business without substances
Fatherhood, perspective and life with twin daughters

Ross speaks honestly about paranoia, using alone in hotel rooms, chasing the illusion of the “champagne lifestyle,” and how addiction is far more powerful than love or ambition.
This episode is raw, relatable and hopeful — especially for anyone who believes they can’t get sober in the party scene.
🎧 If you’re struggling, know that recovery is possible.
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