This is not a subject many of us discuss is it? Birth plans, maybe, weddings, definitely, but we will all die and we all need a send off, however small and modest. This episode isn't really about planning your own funeral, although it can be of course (but as we'll see, don't be too prescriptive) but it's more that this potentially distressing subject - a funeral is the ultimate distress purchase - is important. Why? A good funeral is the start of grieving, it can help people come together to remember the person who has died. Because we don't tend to want to discuss funerals (although this is changing, thank goodness) it's very easy to just go with what your high street funeral director offers and not realise there can be another way. Do you know you don't even need to use a funeral director? Or not for all of it? You don't need a hearse, either, or a coffin, or you can make the coffin. There are various possibilities to make funerals more personal instead of, as Louise describes them 'templated'. We discuss woodland burials, the law around funerals (surprisingly few) and much more, including 'what's next' in terms of body disposal.I think a good funeral is one where, if the person who has died were to magically come alive, they wouldn't feel out of place. And a good funeral can be very healing for those left behind.Louise is a progressive funeral director and her London based company is called Poetic Endings. She is also the co-director of an award winning festival and community called Life, Death, Whatever which seeks to change how we talk about death and dying andLouise co-authored of an excellent book called We All Know How This Ends. And we do, don't we? Know how this ends. So let's start talking about it.Here are the links talked about in this episode.Josh’s funeral: https://thegoodgriefproject.co.uk/our-films/https://www.poetic-endings.com/when-someone-dieshttps://www.lifedeathwhatever.comhttps://www.goodfuneralguide.co.ukhttp://www.naturaldeath.org.ukhttps://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jan/06/it-was-an-incredibly-enriching-day-the-families-taking-control-of-deathMake a one off donation: https://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieriWant this podcast ad free: head over to my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/annalisabarbieri Follow us: Twitter: @AnnalisaB, Instagram: @pocketannalisaSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieri. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The way labour and birth is depicted on film and TV has bugged me for some years and, I think, does little to make women feel empowered. This episode isn't about how or where to give birth - that's your choice - but we do talk about what happens in an uncomplicated vaginal birth.Amy is the Lead Research Midwife in the Department of Obstetrics and Gynaecology at the university of Cambridge, and study coordinator for the Pregnancy Outcome Prediction Study 2 (POPS2). She's previously worked as a senior research midwife in the NHS, and as the Eastern Regions Champion Research Midwife for the NIHR. Amy received a Chief Midwifery Officer Silver Award in 2020 for her work in reproductive health and childbirth research.Amy has also been an independent midwife, which is when I met her as she delivered my second child. Birthrights is a great charity that helps you understand your rights when giving birth in the UK.https://www.birthrights.org.ukMake a one off donation: https://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieriWant this podcast ad free: head over to my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/annalisabarbieri Follow us: Twitter: @AnnalisaB, Instagram: @pocketannalisaSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieri. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is our first listener requested episode. "Joanne" (not her real name) asked us if we could do an episode on trust, after her husband had an affair. Although Joanne asked some specific questions ("how do I get the trust back/is it good to talk about it"), Dr Blumenthal and I discuss this but also what trust is at its core, beyond romantic relationships, what it means to trust, how do we trust, is it necessary to trust someone to love them, and how to get trust back when it's been lost.Dr Blumenthal spoke so eloquently in series 2, on Intimacy, and that is a great companion piece to this one. Make a one off donation: https://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieriWant this podcast ad free: head over to my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/annalisabarbieri Follow us: Twitter: @AnnalisaB, Instagram: @pocketannalisaSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieri. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a difficult subject, but an important one. I still get letters from people unsure whether they've been the survivor of sexual violence.My guest is Katie Russell, former media officer for Rape Crisis and now CEO of Support After Rape and Sexual Violence Leeds (SARSVL). Katie is a specialist in sexual violence and abuse against women and girls with over 18 years' diverse experience within the Rape Crisis movement and wider voluntary and community sector.In this episode we talk about what rape and sexual assault is, and also address other aspects of sexual violence. We talk about consent, and how it's an active, not a passive act. I.e. just because you didn't say no, it doesn't mean you meant yes.We talk about the trauma response and how that can affect your response to sexual violence, and how this isn't anything you have control over. In an ideal world I'd like everyone over the age of about fourteen to listen to this and really understand what consent is, because without understanding consent you can't be sure you've got it. And if you haven't got consent, you may be committing an act of rape or sexual assault. I talk about organisations and articles in the episode and here are the relevant links:https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/jan/19/are-obedient-children-a-good-thinghttps://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/jan/08/shouldnt-force-child-kiss-grandparent-consent-sex-educationIf you or someone you know has been affected by the subject matter of this episode you can get help and support by putting in the words rape crisis and the county you live in into Google. SARSVL is the organisation mentioned and where Katie works is at. Rape Crisis England and Wales.The 24 hour helpline Katie mentions is on 0808 500 2222.Support for men and boys affected by rape or sexual violence:The legislation we refer to is the 2003 Sexual Offences Act.Make a one off donation: https://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieriWant this podcast ad free: head over to my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/annalisabarbieri Follow us: Twitter: @AnnalisaB, Instagram: @pocketannalisaSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieri. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What does it mean to belong? What does it feel like? And does it even matter? I started asking myself this a few years ago, possibly because, as a child of immigrants, I wasn't sure I ever felt like I truly, 100%, ever belonged in any one place. But, does anyone?My specialist, for this episode, Mark Vahrmeyer is a UKCP registered integrative psychotherapist who is very psychoanalytically informed. Mark was born in England to a Dutch father and an English mother but moved extensively, as you’ll hear, as a child. He is a third culture kid and we’ll discuss what this means in more detail in the episode.We also look at how important attachment is in determining how much we feel we belong, or don’t. How self esteem also impacts and how very important human connection is to psychologically tether us to a sense of belonging. We also look at why you might feel you don’t belong in the very place you think you might have an automatic right to -  your own family.If you’d like to learn more about Mark and his work his website is brightonandhovepsychotherapy.comMake a one off donation: https://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieriWant this podcast ad free: head over to my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/annalisabarbieri Follow us: Twitter: @AnnalisaB, Instagram: @pocketannalisaSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/conversations-with-annalisa-barbieri. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.