Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens

Loot boxes, in-app purchases, Robux, skins — and a kid who won't stop asking for them. If you're a parent of a tween or teen gamer, you already know this pressure. But are these purchases actually harmful, or are you just out of touch with how gaming works today?

In-app purchases are one of the most confusing pressure points for parents of tweens and teens right now. The games are "free to download," but they’re not really free. And when real money turns into Robux or gems, it can disappear fast.

In this episode, clinical psychologist and bestselling author Dr. Lisa Damour and Reena Ninan break down exactly what's going on inside these video games, what parents actually need to worry about, and how to set clear, calm limits without turning every gaming session into a fight.

💡 YOU'LL LEARN:

- Why "free-to-play" games aren't actually free, and how to explain the business model to your kid in a way that sticks

- The difference between cosmetic skins and loot boxes

- How virtual currencies like Robux and gems are specifically designed to make spending feel like it's not real money

- A simple framework for talking about whose money, how much, and what happens when it runs out

- How to stay warm and curious about your kid's gaming life in a way that prioritizes a strong relationship with your kid

Gaming isn't the enemy, but clever marketing is baked into these platforms, and your kid needs you to be one step ahead of it. This episode gives you the language and the confidence to do exactly that.

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Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

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In recognition of National Fentanyl Awareness Day, we're bringing back one of our most critical episodes — because every family needs this information.

Illicit fentanyl has contaminated the drug landscape and is causing record deaths among young people. How should parents talk with their teens about this fast-moving crisis? What can we say to help keep our kids safe?

Dr. Lisa Damour, who serves on the advisory board of Song for Charlie, and Reena Ninan are joined by Ed Ternan and Marcia Lee Taylor of Song for Charlie, the national nonprofit behind National Fentanyl Awareness Day. Ed, who tragically lost his 22-year-old son to a counterfeit prescription pill, and Marcia, former President and CEO of the Partnership for Drug-Free Kids, cover the basics about fentanyl and offer concrete guidance on how to have effective conversations with teens about its dangers.

If you've already heard this episode, share it with someone who hasn't. It could save a life.

Be sure to check out The New Drug Talk resources available at their website: ⁠www.songforcharlie.org⁠

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Today's sponsors:

Donors Choose: Have your gift matched today at https://www.donorschoose.org/asklisa.

Cash App: For a limited time, new Cash App customers can earn $10 if they use code: FAMILY10.

________________

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

________________

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Your tween won't shower, won't change their clothes, or lies about having brushed their teeth or washed their face...Sound familiar?

If you're in the middle of a hygiene battle with your tween or young teen, you're not alone, and you're not failing as a parent. This is one of the most common (and confusing) challenges of early adolescence, especially when basic resistance starts to take the form of sneaking or lying.

In this episode, clinical psychologist and New York Times bestselling author Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan unpack what's really driving your tween's hygiene resistance, why the lying is probably not what you think it is, and what you can actually do to move things in the right direction without constant conflict.

💡 YOU'LL LEARN:

- Why tweens suddenly resist hygiene routines they never had to think about before

- How puberty and bodily autonomy are at the heart of the power struggle

- Why tweens sometimes lie about this

- What to say instead of nagging, checking, or trying to force them to change habits

- When to let it go, when to hold the line, and when to bring in outside help

- How to use habit science to make new hygiene routines actually stick

This episode will help you stop spinning in frustration and start responding in ways that protect your relationship, respect your child's growing need for independence, and actually get results.________________

 GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER

Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠

 DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS

- Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠

- Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠

- The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠

 UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP

Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠

 VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠

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Today's sponsors:

Pestie: For 10% off your order go to https://pestie.com/ASKLISA.

Cash App: New Cash App customers earn $10 if they use code FAMILY10. https://cash.app/

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Momentous: Get 5% off your first order with promo code ASKLISA at https://www.livemomentous.com

________________

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

________________

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Podcast keywords:

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Creatine for teens, supplements for teen athletes, and navigating gym culture pressure on social media… Dr. Lisa Damour answers the question parents of teen athletes are searching for.

Your teen's teammate is taking creatine. Now your kid wants it too. Maybe they're a serious athlete with real goals. Maybe you even take supplements yourself. But something still feels… off. This is genuinely a hard call, and you deserve expert guidance on how to start this conversation with your kid. 

In this episode, clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan dig into one of the fastest-growing pressure points for teen athletes: supplements. From creatine to protein powder to "pre-workout," teens (especially boys) are being flooded with messages about muscle, performance, and products — all through social media, influencers, and even their own teammates. And most of them aren't asking their parents before they start taking them.

Dr. Lisa walks you through exactly how to think about this, how to talk about it with your teen, and where to draw the line.

💡 YOU'LL LEARN:

- What should always come before a "yes" or "no" to any supplement

- How to find out what's really driving your teen's request (performance, body image, peer pressure, all of the above?)

- What to say when your teen insists "everyone on the team is doing it"

- How to talk about supplement marketing and why influencers aren't looking out for your kid

- When to go from "keeping an eye on it" to "this needs an intervention"

- The red flag Dr. Lisa says worries her most about teens and gym culture

________________

 GET DR. DAMOUR'S FREE WEEKLY NEWSLETTER

Guidance, strategies, and tips delivered straight to your inbox → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/sign-up-for-my-newsletter/⁠

 DR. DAMOUR'S BESTSELLING BOOKS

- Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions into Adulthood – ⁠https://bit.ly/UntangledBook⁠

- Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls – ⁠https://bit.ly/UnderPressuretheBook⁠

- The Emotional Lives of Teenagers: Raising Connected, Capable, and Compassionate Adolescents – ⁠https://a.co/d/cbOmTKp⁠

 UNTANGLING 10TO20 MEMBERSHIP

Premium courses & resources for teens and the adults who care for them → ⁠https://lnkd.in/gr52MB-F⁠

 VISIT DR. LISA'S WEBSITE → ⁠https://drlisadamour.com/⁠

________________

Today's Sponsors:

Mill: $75 off with your membership code ASKLISA at https://www.mill.com/asklisa.

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Common Sense Media: Download the Common Sense Media app today: https://www.commonsensemedia.org/apps

________________

Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

________________

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Your teen got into college. Now comes the harder question: are they actually ready to go?

If you're wondering whether they have what it takes to handle a difficult roommate, navigate the college party scene, or make real friends on their own, you're not alone. This is one of the most common, and least talked about, worries parents carry into the summer before college drop-off.

In this episode, clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan cut through the anxiety to give you a clear-eyed, compassionate framework for assessing your teen's readiness, and practical steps you can still take right now, even if you're not sure they're there yet.

💡 YOU'LL LEARN:

- The two real indicators of college readiness

- How to talk to your teen about roommates, parties, peer pressure, and personal safety

- Why smartphones are making social adjustment harder, and what actually helps teens find their people

- When it might be wiser to delay college or take a gap year, and how to do it without derailing their future

- How to have the big pre-college talks when your teen keeps slipping out the door

Whether your child is heading to campus in the fall or years away from that moment, this conversation will help you feel more grounded, more prepared, and less alone in your worries.

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Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Raising Tweens & Teens is the essential podcast for parents seeking expert guidance, tested strategies, and psychological insights on raising kids, especially tweens and teens. Join renowned clinical psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and former journalist and mom of two Reena Ninan as they explore real-life parenting challenges.  Looking to learn more about how to boost kids’ resilience, build their confidence, or support their emotional well-being? Dr. Lisa and Reena have got you covered! Together they address listener questions about stress, anxiety, social media concerns, school pressures, and challenges in peer relationships. Each episode provides practical advice and science-backed solutions to help parents raise resilient, confident, and emotionally healthy kids. Tune in every week for the latest topics in parenting, child psychology, and family wellness. Get answers to your most pressing parenting questions. New episodes drop every Tuesday.

________________

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