Equal-ish

What if the path to a more equal home life didn’t require a huge conversation… but just one small experiment?
In this After the Interview episode of Equal-ish, Kate and Rachel reflect on their conversation with Hayley Swenson from New America and put some of the Better Life Lab behavioural experiments to the test in their own families.
The idea behind the experiments is simple: instead of trying to redesign your entire relationship or household system, start with small habit changes that gently shift behaviour over time.
Rachel explores how simple boundary-setting tools can help protect work-life balance and reduce the pressure to always be “on”. Kate shares how “sharing the magic” can sometimes reveal that the things we spend hours creating aren’t even the things our kids care most about.
We also touch on fascinating new research from Miranda Dotson exploring division of labour in relationships where one partner is trans or non-binary. Her work introduces the concept of “gender heritage” — the idea that the way we are socialised as children may influence how we divide household labour more than our current gender identity.
It’s a reminder that the patterns couples struggle with today often begin long before relationships even start.
If equality at home feels overwhelming, this episode offers a different approach: start small, experiment, and see what shifts.
Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. 
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.
Read the Miranda Dodson article

This episode is proudly supported by the Relationscapes Podcast

What if the reason equality at home feels impossible isn’t a lack of commitment but a lack of time?
This week, Kate and Rachel sit down with Haley Swenson, gender researcher and deputy director at New America, to explore the work behind the Better Life Lab Experiments (BLLX) — an initiative focused on practical, evidence-informed ways to rebalance household labor.
Hayley shares how BLLX emerged from a simple but urgent question: if we have decades of data showing unequal division of labor at home, why do we have so little evidence about what actually helps couples change it?
Drawing on behavioral science, design thinking, and real families’ lived experiences, BLLX takes a different approach. Instead of promising perfect equality, it encourages couples to run small, low-stakes experiments — from rethinking chore systems to redefining holiday expectations.
In this conversation, we explore:
Why the most overwhelmed partner is often the one searching for solutions

How “too busy to change” becomes the biggest barrier to change

Why buy-in (not chore charts) is often the real starting point

The hidden emotional stakes of holidays and “magic making”

How giving your partner the benefit of the doubt can shift everything

What it means to design equity for real, messy, overworked families

Hayley also reflects candidly on her own marriage — including her surprise at discovering that even in a same-sex relationship, patterns of unequal labor can still emerge. Find out more about the BLL experiments here:
Better Life Lab Experiments 
All The Things Spreadsheet
Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. 
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.
This episode is supported by Relationscapes Podcast.

What becomes visible about a relationship when the romance is removed?
In this new After the Interview episode, Kate and Rachel reflect on their powerful conversation with mediator and parent coordinator Traci Cherrier. We unpack the realities of co-parenting after separation and why the same lessons apply to couples who are still together.
The statistics are sobering:
39% of separated parents say unequal caring responsibilities contributed to their breakup.

Working couples where mothers carry primary childcare are 92% more likely to separate.

70% of divorces are initiated by women.

But this isn’t a doom-and-gloom episode. Instead, we explore:
What “parallel parenting” teaches us about trust and control

Why separated couples often communicate more intentionally than married ones

The power of writing down shared values before conflict hits

How unspoken expectations about gender roles quietly erode relationships

And why “great advice” is so hard to implement in real life

Whether you’re co-parenting across two homes or navigating equality under one roof, this episode will challenge you to rethink how you communicate, divide responsibility, and re-contract your relationship as life changes.
Because if Equal-ish was easy, we wouldn’t need this conversation.
Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. 

Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

What does “equal-ish” look like when you’re no longer a couple? This was a question Kate and Rachel have been pondering for a while. 
In this powerful conversation, mediator and parent coordinator Traci Cherrier joins Rachel and Kate to unpack the emotional and practical realities of co-parenting after separation. From navigating the grief cycle to shifting from intimate communication to business-like collaboration, Traci offers grounded, compassionate guidance for families in transition. But there was so much of the conversation that we can all take into our journey to be more equal-ish. 
We explore:
Why one partner may already be “ahead” in the grief process

The difference between cooperative and parallel parenting

How to move from a victim mindset to empowered decision-making

Why documenting agreements clearly can reduce future conflict

And the most important question mediators ask couples at odds

At the heart of it all is one powerful idea: even when your relationship changes, your shared hopes for your children can become your glue.
This episode is essential listening for anyone navigating separation — or supporting families who are.
Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. 
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

In this After the Interview episode, Rachel Childs and Kate Mangino unpack the conversations they couldn’t stop thinking about after speaking with behavioural economist Dr Corinne Low. Corinne Low, PhD is an associate professor of business economics and public policy at the Wharton School, and the author of Having It All (Femononics in the UK).
We reflect on what it really means to bring “ruthless practicality” into how we choose partners, and how we raise children who might one day want equalish relationships of their own. From the hidden economics shaping how couples value time, money, and care, to the emotional backlash many women feel when they invest time in themselves, this episode explores the tension between rational decision-making and deeply ingrained social norms.
We sit with some of the hardest questions the data raises: 
why the years when childcare and household labour peak are often the most strained for relationships

how easily these conversations can slide into gender blame 

whether outsourcing domestic work genuinely lightens the load, or simply shifts responsibility and privilege elsewhere.

There are no easy answers here. Just honest reflections on how couples are trying to navigate love, work, parenting, and fairness inside a system that was never designed to support them.
Find out more about Corinne’s work here: www.corinnelow.com 
Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. 
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.