Relational Lives Podcast

Join Ali and Ros for a raw, heartfelt, and unscripted conversation as they look back on eight months and over 30 episodes of Relational Lives. In this special episode, the hosts pull back the curtain on their journey — from the shock of going viral on Shut Up & Talking (160,000+ views!) to building a podcast from scratch, all while navigating friendship, vulnerability, and the realities of being two women in their 50s in the digital world.   They reflect on standout guests (like Caz’s powerful journey to embracing single life), explore how recording together has triggered old patterns, and share the moment one host bravely called out a “pedestal” dynamic — and how they repaired it. With warmth and honesty, they discuss what’s worked, what hasn’t, and why they’re pausing the podcast to regroup, recharge, and listen to YOU.  This isn’t just a recap, it’s a real conversation about growth, repair, and walking the talk of relational therapy.  Plus, they’re asking: What did YOU love? What should we do more of? Less of? (Sex and intimacy? More casual chats? Bring back “Would You Rather”?)  Your feedback will shape Season 3.   Timestamps   00:00 – Welcome: Why This Episode Feels Different   00:30 – From Zero to 30: How It All Began   01:00 – The Viral Moment: Shut Up & Talking (160K Views!)   01:49 – The Younger Generation’s Mental Health Awareness   02:49 – 30+ Episodes in 8 Months: The Numbers   03:26 – Being 50+ in a Gen Z Podcast World   04:05 – “Mum, I wouldn’t watch you because of your age”   05:11 – Caz’s Story: Losing Yourself in Relationships   06:20 – Other Guests That Moved Us   07:30 – When Friendship Meets Therapy: The Pedestal Moment   40:57 – Calling It Out: Courage & Repair   41:43 – “The trouble with pedestals…”   42:54 – Catching Triggers Early: Walking the Talk   43:50 – Why We’re Pausing: Regroup, Recharge, Listen   44:19 – What’s Next? Sex, Intimacy & Your Ideas   45:11 – Feedback Wanted: More Chats? More Guests?   45:58 – Bring Back “Would You Rather”?   46:23 – Thank You & See You in Season 3 We Want to Hear From You  What did you love most?   What should we do more of (or less)?   Topics you want: Sex? Intimacy? Parenting?   Style: More casual chats? Shorter episodes? Drop us a message: [email protected] Or fill in anonymously: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT Connect with us  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/   TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives   LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ All past episodes are still available — go back and revisit your favourites!  Subscribe so you don’t miss Season 3. If this episode resonated, please like, share, and tell a friend.   Disclaimer Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only.  Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.   Credits  Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk   Music by: Stile Tree Studio   Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio (Thanks, Paul!)

For a decade, RED (Rise Every Day) January has inspired thousands to move more, feel better, and support one another through the darkest month of the year. Now, it’s taking a bold new step forward — and it starts with you.  Join the nationwide warm-up to RED January 2026 at redjanuary.com.   Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives for an inspiring conversation with Hannah Beecham, founder of Red January, as she shares the deeply personal story behind this life-changing initiative. Born from her own family’s battle with depression — watching her mum struggle through the winter blues and finding solace in simple side-by-side walks — Hannah reveals how a single act of connection sparked a global movement. At just 29, she turned helplessness into hope, creating a challenge that’s now helped countless people rise every day with gentle movement, community support, and real behavioral change.  From its evolution to a community interest company to exciting new research on its impact, this episode explores why January — with its short days and post-holiday slump — needs a splash of red more than ever. Whether you’re signing up for 2026 or seeking motivation now, Hannah’s journey is a reminder that small steps, shared stories, and self-compassion can light the way through the toughest seasons.   Timestamps   00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Hannah Beecham   01:06 – What is Red January? Rise Every Day Explained   02:34 – The Inspiration: Hannah’s Mum’s Battle with Depression   04:45 – Family Walks: Finding Connection Side by Side   06:20 – Turning Helplessness into Action: Starting the Challenge   07:59 – The First January: Small Goals, Big Impact   10:00 – Evolution from Daily Runs to Flexible Movement   11:18 – Why January? Tackling the Darkest Month   13:10 – Behavioral Activation: Science Behind the Movement   14:43 – Winter Blues, Christmas Pressures & Red’s Role   16:06 – Community Power: Sharing Stories and Support   18:00 – Red January Today: A Community Interest Company   20:00 – New Research: Measuring Real Change   22:00 – Global Reach: Anyone, Anywhere Can Join   24:00 – Advice for Getting Started: Motivation When It’s Hard   26:00 – Pets, Family & Everyday Wins   28:00 – Future Plans: Advocacy and Expansion   30:00 – Hannah’s Journey: From Personal Pain to Purpose   32:00 – Mum’s Legacy: Walking Together Still   34:00 – Call to Action: Sign Up for 2026   36:00 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways Sign Up for RED January 2026: https://join.redjanuary.com/ (Free to join, set your own movement goal) Connect with us  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives   Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/   TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives   LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at [email protected] or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.   Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics.  If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.   Disclaimer Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only.  Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.   Credits  Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk   Music by: Stile Tree Studio   Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio  

Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives for a deeply moving conversation with Julie Russell, who shares the tender and inspiring story of her son Fraser, born with a rare life-limiting genetic condition. From the shock of his diagnosis hours after birth to the profound care provided by their local children’s hospice, Julie reflects on the joy, love, and support that defined Fraser’s two short years.   With music therapy at the heart of their journey, she highlights how it brought connection, comfort, and celebration of life, even in the face of loss. Now, Julie and hospice music therapist Vicky have co-edited a powerful book amplifying family and practitioner voices in paediatric palliative care.   This episode is a heartfelt reminder to live fully in the moment and honour every life, however brief. Have tissues ready, this is a story of love, resilience, and legacy. Timestamps 00:00 – Welcome & Honouring Fraser’s Story 02:01 – Julie’s Journey: Fraser’s Diagnosis at Birth 04:31 – From SCBU to St Thomas’ NICU: A Terrifying Start 06:15 – Bonding Through Crisis: “I Just Needed to Be With Him” 08:36 – Discovering the Children’s Hospice: A Turning Point 11:28 – Music Therapy: Building Connection and Joy 15:29 – Family Life at the Hospice: Sibling Support & Normal Moments 18:00 – Celebrating Fraser: Birthdays, Christmas, and Love 22:43 – The Final Days: A Peaceful, Supported End of Life 27:32 – Grief, Legacy, and Staying Connected to Fraser 36:26 – The Book: Collaborative Voices in Music Therapy & Palliative Care 40:11 – Why Family Stories Matter in Paediatric Palliative Care 43:34 – Co-Editing with Vicky: Honouring Lived Experience 46:02 – The Power of Music Therapy: Life-Changing for Families 47:57 – Closing Reflections: A Good Life, A Good Death 48:32 – Thank You & Call to Action Connect with us Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at [email protected] or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.   Links to the book: Music Therapy in Children’s Palliative Care Collaborative Family and Practitioner Voices https://tinyurl.com/5n833vtd: https://amzn.eu/d/83U3jqJ https://tinyurl.com/3ybk3bbw https://julesrussellillustration.co.uk/ - Jules Russell Illustrations   Disclaimer Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk Music by: Stile Tree Studio Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives as we sit down with Philippa Smethurst, author of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma, to explore the complex world of trauma and recovery. Inspired by the varied responses to the pandemic, Philippa shares her insights on trauma responses beyond fight or flight, using powerful metaphors like the trauma thermometer and jam jars to explain how overwhelming experiences can shake us up like a Coke bottle. From the isolating nature of trauma to the hope of post-traumatic growth, she offers practical strategies—like breathing exercises and self-compassion—to help release the “fizz” of trauma. With references to her book’s tools, including the “Trauma Kit” and stories like the Japanese kintsugi bowl, Philippa highlights how small steps can lead to resilience and healing. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking to understand and navigate trauma with clarity and hope.   Timestamps 00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Philippa Smethurst 01:14 – Inspiration Behind 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma 02:22 – Understanding Trauma Responses: Beyond Fight or Flight 04:00 – The Trauma Thermometer: Too Much and Too Little 06:26 – The Coke Bottle Metaphor: Trauma’s Lasting Fizz 08:36 – How Trauma Distorts Relationships 10:38 – Judging Trauma Responses: A Common Pitfall 13:23 – The Brain Under Trauma: Overwhelm and Disconnection 16:13 – Strategies for Healing: Releasing the Fizz Slowly 22:43 – The Role of Self-Care in Trauma Recovery 27:32 – Philippa’s Breathing Exercise for Calming the Nervous System 36:26 – The Long Haul: Patience and Faith in Healing 40:11 – Post-Traumatic Growth: The Kintsugi Metaphor 44:27 – Practical Tools: The Child’s Slide Breathing Exercise 46:06 – Keeping On: Small Steps for Big Change 47:24 – Compassion and Self-Care: The Heart of Recovery 49:15 – Stories of Resilience: Terry Waite and Post-Traumatic Growth 50:58 – Philippa’s Book and Resources for Healing 51:55 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways Follow Philippa Smethurst YouTube: https://youtube.com/@philippasmethurst Newsletter: https://philippasmethurst.com/news#contactform Order 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma: https://philippasmethurst.com/bookshop (Currently £13.79 on Amazon) Blogs: https://philippasmethurst.com/news | https://talkingtrauma.substack.com/ For This Episode Trauma Thermometer: A visual tool to understand trauma responses, from the “red zone” (hyperarousal) to the “blue zone” (hypoarousal). View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/19MDNHPnfI5Y4k5xIrGGGTGvfOJOmTV7a/view?usp=drive_link Jam Jars Metaphor: From Appendix 2 of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma, illustrating how trauma accumulates and can be processed. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1e5gbchTdzR1wRTI7Psazw0J_v_zaNebD/view?usp=drive_link Margaret Forster’s Over: Referenced as an illustration of incident trauma. View book cover: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk9pusrufnj_3vm-SuyKuhoLhDTmfjCj/view?usp=drive_link Breath Practice (p. 37, Chapter One): “Breathe in for a count of four, out for a count of seven, or use the child’s slide technique: inhale through your nose like climbing small steps, then exhale long through your mouth.” 20 Pathways to Resilience and Recovery After Trauma: A visual guide to the strategies in Philippa’s book. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1bXQbyBkpHenI0zG7wV84FpHRUgmumRYj/view?usp=drive_link Trauma Kit: “In a medical trauma kit, you may find a stethoscope, needles, a trauma blanket, gloves, scissors… but what might we need in a psychological trauma kit? Because trauma is often hidden inside, we need an even wider array of self-help, and other kinds of help - one size does not fit all. Philippa Smethurst’s new book is your go-to handbook.” View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/17hSkDG9KHgxtl2fdllXMnnEmi5gtHK_W/view?usp=drive_link Book Cover: Front cover of 20 Ways to Break Free from Trauma. View image: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1xmN3LI8Lga1LINDUCrrHxFZN-D3ol7JG/view?usp=drive_link Connect with us Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/ Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode. Drop us a message at [email protected] or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT. We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before. Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.   Disclaimer Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only. Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help. Credits Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk Music by: Stile Tree Studio Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio

Join hosts Ali and Ros on Relational Lives for a heartfelt follow-on from our autism episode, as we welcome Rose, who shares her inspiring journey of being diagnosed with autism at 15.  From early signs like shying away from eye contact as a baby to navigating meltdowns and masking in secondary school, Rose opens up about the challenges of sensory sensitivities, emotional overwhelm, and finding her place in a neurotypical world. She reflects on the transformative impact of homeschooling, counselling, and embracing her passion for working with children in a nursery. Rose encourages self-compassion and openness, offering hope to anyone exploring their own autism journey.  This episode is a must-listen for those seeking to understand autism through a personal lens, filled with resilience and practical wisdom. Timestamps: 00:00 – Welcome & Introducing Rose 01:19 – Rose’s Autism Journey: Early Signs from Infancy 02:56 – Developmental Delays and Misconceptions About Autism 05:07 – Secondary School Struggles: Meltdowns and Masking 07:11 – A Turning Point: Autism Awareness Day at School 09:07 – Navigating the Diagnosis Process: NHS and Private Routes 11:28 – The Impact of Autism on Family Dynamics 13:38 – Emotional Blockages and the Power of Counselling 15:29 – Homeschooling: Finding Freedom in Intensive Interests 18:00 – Building Self-Awareness and Confidence 22:43 – Sensory Sensitivities: Managing Bright Lights and Noise 27:32 – Rose’s Career: Thriving in a Nursery Environment 36:26 – The Support of Family: A Mother’s Understanding 38:23 – Connecting with a Neurodivergent Cousin 40:11 – Living Independently: Controlling Her Own Space 42:00 – Workplace Support and Managing Masking 43:11 – Strategies for Self-Compassion: Journaling and Cheerleading 44:39 – Finding Balance Through Hobbies: Clay and Watercolour Painting 45:35 – Advice for Others Exploring Autism 47:07 – Rose’s Message: “Don’t Diss Your Ability” 48:19 – Closing Thoughts & Takeaways   For This Episode:  National Autistic Society: Learn more about autism and support services https://www.autism.org.uk/ Connect with us: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/relational_lives Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/relationallives/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@relational_lives LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tempo-psychotherapy-services-33a00318/   Want to share your story or come on the show to discuss your dilemma? Write to us, and we might cover it in a future episode.  Drop us a message at [email protected] or anonymously complete our form here: https://forms.office.com/e/qcrCkbhPiT.  We’d also love to hear updates if you’ve written in before.   Subscribe for future episodes on trauma, attachment, and more mental health topics. If you found this episode helpful, please like this video or share it with a friend.   Disclaimer: Please remember, this is not meant to be a replacement for personal therapy and is for information and self-reflection only.  Please reach out to an appropriate professional in your area if you feel you need individualised help.   Credits: Hosts: Alison Bickers and Ros Peckham at www.mytempo.co.uk Music by: Stile Tree Studio Produced by: Synergy Podcast Studio