Disordered: Anxiety Help

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https://disordered.fm/community
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In this episode, Josh and Drew tackle a common hurdle in anxiety recovery: what happens when an exposure feels like a "failure" or when you choose to "bail."
An exposure is the deliberate act of evoking an anxious response. It is a way to rewire the brain by intentionally lighting up the threat response and practicing response prevention. The goal is to teach your brain that you are safe even when you feel scared, rather than trying to force yourself to feel calm.
Many people believe that feeling high levels of anxiety during an exposure means they have failed. This is a misconception. The exposure is designed to make you feel anxious; therefore, feeling those symptoms is exactly what is supposed to happen.
"Failure" is often a label generated by your Inner Critic based on perfectionist expectations. True growth comes from being willing to experience the discomfort, even if the execution feels "messy".
Bailing occurs when the discomfort becomes overwhelming and you choose to retreat. While this can feel like a setback, it is often a signal that you need more self-compassion. We discuss the "punch in the face" moment. That's the the point where the plan goes out the window because the physical sensations or intrusive thoughts become intense.
The "Bad Day Playbook": Don't try to make it up on the fly when you're panicked. Have a pre-planned set of actions to take if an exposure doesn't go as intended.

Avoid "White-Knuckling": Simply "pushing through" while counting down the seconds to escape is not the same as a willing exposure.

The Goal is Willingness: Recovery is about changing your relationship with the anxiety, not eliminating the feeling. Even an "unplanned" exposure—like a sudden intrusive thought or a physical symptom—is an opportunity to practice these principles.

Go Through the Peak: If possible, try not to leave the situation at the height of your distress. Leaving on the "back end" of the peak, on your own terms, provides the best learning opportunity for your brain.

We also share "Did It Anyway" stories from the community, including a powerful example of navigating health anxiety during a family party.
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Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.
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Got a question or did it anyway to share? Send us an email or voicemail on our website.

Want to talk about what you're hearing today with Josh, Drew, and others that are sharing your experience? Check out the Disordered Community Space:
https://disordered.fm/community
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This episode of Disordered addresses the experience of constant, simmering anxiety that fluctuates in intensity throughout the day without fully disappearing. We refer to this as undulating panic or a loop of peaking anxiety.

The Nature of Rolling Anxiety: Many people that they are different because they don't have anxiety that appears, then disappears. It rolls and undulates throughout the day. This is the rule, not the exception. We explain how an internal fixation on bodily sensations and thoughts creates a cycle where anxiety rises and falls continually.

The Monitoring Trap: Using scales like Subjective Units of Distress (SUDs) can become a compulsion. When you constantly scan your body to check if you are a "four" or a "nine," you maintain the rolling, undulating sensitized state you are trying to escape.

The Sand Timer Analogy: Physiological and mental arousal (yes, even a full panic attack) has a beginning, middle, and end. Once the "sand timer" of an adrenaline spike is flipped, it must run its course. Attempting to "shake the timer" through frantic coping mechanisms only slows down the natural process of settling.

Recovery Through Action: We share listener stories of "doing it anyway" despite monophobia and physical pain. These examples illustrate how recovery involves moving forward while discomfort is present rather than waiting for it to stop.

Recovery is grounded in the principle of psychological flexibility. The goal is to learn to be with difficult internal experiences like fear and physical sensations rather than trying to control or prevent them. By treating these fluctuations as a background noise rather than a defining event, you teach your brain that the state is not a signal of danger.

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The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.
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Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.
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Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

Want to discuss what you hear on this episode with Josh and Drew and others that are sharing your experience? Check out the Disordered Podcast Community Space.
https://disordered.fm/communty
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In this episode of Disordered, we celebrate the "Global Edition" of Did It Anyway.
We're sharing inspiring stories from our community members around the world who chose to face their fears and take action despite experiencing intense anxiety.
From navigating health anxiety at a drum and bass gig in London to managing emetophobia while being physically ill, these stories highlight the power of psychological flexibility. We discuss how recovery isn't about the absence of anxiety, but rather the shortening of the time between "oh my god" and "oh well".
The "Did It Anyway" Mindset: How listeners applied this approach to return to work, travel, and social situations despite panic and agoraphobia.

Desensitization in Real-Time: Using exposure therapy principles to stay present with uncomfortable physical sensations rather than retreating.

Challenging Safety Behaviors: Stories of individuals staying home alone for the first time in weeks or eating "fear foods" to reclaim their lives.

Overcoming the Inner Critic: Learning to move into productive problem-solving mode instead of self-berating when anxiety spikes and thinking isn't perfectly clear.

Recovery as a Journey: Emphasizing that while these principles are simple, implementing them is a gradual process that requires patience and persistence.

We also touch on the importance of self-compassion and acknowledging that even when life is genuinely difficult—such as dealing with family health struggles—you can still apply these principles to your recovery and desensitization work.
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The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.
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Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.
-----
Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

Want to talk about what you're hearing in this episode with Josh and Drew and others that share your experience?
https://disordered.fm/community
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In this episode, Josh and Drew break down the "Stress Jug"—a metaphor designed to explain why anxiety and panic often seem to appear out of nowhere. The guys discuss how accumulated stress, both positive and negative, can cause your "threat response" to overflow, leading to sensitization and the search for a threat where none exists.
The Mechanics of Overflow: How the amygdala misinterprets a full "stress jug" as immediate danger, triggering unexpected fear and physical symptoms.

The Role of Meaning-Making: Why your brain creates narratives (like health anxiety or fear of "going crazy") to explain internal discomfort.

Beyond "Emptying the Jug": Why recovery isn't about avoiding stress or keeping the jug empty, but learning to tolerate the overflow when life gets heavy.

"Meta-Stress": Understanding the additional weight of being stressed about being stressed, and how that contributes to the cycle of disordered anxiety.

The "Gunk" at the Bottom: Addressing long-term factors like grief, self-esteem, or unprocessed emotions that occupy space in your jug.

We're also sharing "Did It Anyway" stories from the community, including a listener’s trip to Jamaica despite anxiety and a first-time solo drive after years of avoidance. These stories highlight the importance of taking action even when you don't yet believe you are safe.
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The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.
---
Struggling with worry and rumination that you feel you can't stop or control? Check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Worry and Rumination Explained⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, a two hour pre-recorded workshop produced by Josh and Drew. The workshop takes a deep dive into the mechanics of worrying and ruminating, offering some helpful ways to approach the seemingly unsolvable problem of trying to solve seemingly unsolvable problems.
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Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.

Questions about this episode? Want to interact with Drew, Josh, and other members of the Disordered audience? Check out the Disordered Community Space!
⁠https://disordered.fm/community⁠

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This week we're discussing the relationship between anxiety and self-compassion. Self-compassion is often dismissed as a way to avoid difficult tasks or "whine" about struggles, but it is actually a functional part of the desensitization process.

Drew shares how he originally viewed self-compassion as a weakness that would lead to more avoidance, only to realize that berating himself was not actually an effective motivator. Josh explains how a lack of self-compassion can lead to "re-sensitization" when you turn recovery into a performance you have to perfect.

What We Discuss:

The "No Self-Compassion" Mistake: Why driving yourself with brute force and criticism often backfires
Accepting The Current Version of You: The importance of acknowledging that you are currently afraid or avoidant without berating or rejecting yourself for it.
Self-Compassion vs. Coddling: Distinguishing between being kind to yourself while doing hard things and using "kindness" as an excuse to stay on the sofa.
Navigating Misunderstanding: How to handle friends or family who do not understand anxiety disorders and the importance of validating your own experience instead of waiting for them to do it.

Recovery requires the flexibility to be afraid and move forward simultaneously. Using self-compassion means letting the scared version of yourself into the experiential classroom so you can actually learn the lessons found in acceptance, tolerance, surrender, floating, and exposure!

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The Disordered Guide to Health Anxiety is now available. If you're struggling with health anxiety, this book is for you.
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Want a way to ask questions about this episode or interact with other Disordered listeners?  The Disordered app is nearing release! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Visit our home page and get on our mailing list for more information..
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Want to ask us questions, share your wins, or get more information about Josh, Drew, and the Disordered podcast? Send us an email or leave a voicemail on our website.