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How to have Extraordinary Relationships

Lucy Cavendish
How to have Extraordinary Relationships
Latest episode

74 episodes

  • How to have Extraordinary Relationships

    The Last Ordinary Night: Kathryn Flett on Losing Her Son Jackson S6 E3

    20/07/2026 | 53 mins.
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    Kathryn Flett is one of Britain's best known journalists, critics and memoirists. 
    In this powerful and deeply personal conversation, Kathryn discusses the unimaginable loss of her son Jackson and the long, complex journey through grief that followed. With extraordinary openness, she explores the many different shades of grief experienced by everyone involved, why she initially believed the police officer at her door was "talking nonsense", and why real life bore little resemblance to television, right down to there being just one police officer delivering the devastating news.
    She speaks candidly about the level of demonstrative love she found herself needing, the well-meaning but often "wrong" ways people responded, and the painful "reconfiguration of the address book" as friendships and relationships changed forever.
    She also recounts the emotional impact of the inquest, the unexpected shock that followed, and the slow, tentative process of re-entering the world through what she describes as "baby steps". It is an honest, compassionate and ultimately hopeful conversation about surviving the unsurvivable, finding a way forward, and learning to live alongside grief rather than trying to outrun it.
    Kathryn reflects on the role of EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing) therapy in helping her process trauma, why she came to see blame as an unhelpful emotion, and the complicated aftermath that follows a sudden loss. 
    A former editor of Arena magazine and a long-time columnist for The Observer, The Guardian and other national publications, she has built a reputation for combining razor-sharp wit with remarkable emotional honesty. She is currently a Daily Mail's TV critic.

    Key points of the episode:
    The tragic story of how she lost her son.
    The different shades of grief experienced by all concerned.
    Why, when the police came, she did not immediately realise the seriousness of the situation.
    How she felt the policeman was "talking nonsense"
    Her treatment of EMDR- "Eye Movement Desensitiving (and) Reprocessing. 
    Why there was only one police officer at the door (unlike on TV)
    Why blame she felt was an unhelpful emotion.
    The complicated aftermath.
    The level of demonstrative love that she needed.
    The "Wrong" ways people responded.
    The "reconfiguration of the address book."
    The inquest. And then the next shock.
    The re-entering the world. Baby Steps 
    Check out her TV in the Daily Mail or ...
    kathrynflett.substack.com

    Support the show
    Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

    You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

    On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/
  • How to have Extraordinary Relationships

    Being The Change; making meaningful choices about how we live with existential therapist Dr Stella Duffy | S6 E2

    07/07/2026 | 1h 4 mins.
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    Dr Stella Duffy OBE is an existential psychotherapist, award-winning writer, speaker and theatremaker with a career spanning therapy, literature and the arts. Alongside her private practice, she has worked in NHS cancer support, hospice bereavement services and community mental health, helping people navigate life's biggest challenges with warmth, honesty and compassion. 
    Awarded an OBE for Services to the Arts, Stella is also the author of 17 novels, more than 70 short stories and numerous plays. Her doctorate in Existential Psychotherapy focused on the embodied experience of post-menopause, reflecting her passion for exploring what it means to live a rich, authentic and meaningful life. 
    Expect an engaging, thought-provoking evening as Stella shares insights into the human condition, resilience, creativity, and how we can all make better sense of ourselves and the lives we lead.
    Key Points of the Episode:
    How she was the first person in her family to finish secondary school!
    Existential therapy- she practises it- what is it?
    How she has been in therapy herself 3 times in her life.
    Her experience with cancer.
    Her first experience of existential therapy and how she encountered it.
    Her experience of the self help movement.
    Her current practise (hint - slowwwwww down!)
    Why she is such a "doer"
    Her thoughts on education and its privilege.
    Her thoughts and statistics on menopause and the importance of supporting women. (an old school view but still very relevant)
     The problem with current cultural attitudes
    What was really happening during the hunter/gathering period.
    Her new book.
    Sexuality and the freedom after menopause.
    The benefits of an existential outlook on life.
    A motivational message.

    Support the show
    Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

    You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

    On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/
  • How to have Extraordinary Relationships

    Why We Fall For Dangerous People: Killing Eve's Luke Jennings on Villanelle, Eve and Moral Grey Areas S6 E1

    22/06/2026 | 51 mins.
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    Luke Jennings is the bestselling author and journalist whose self-published Villanelle novellas became the global phenomenon Killing Eve.
    Originally released as a series of Kindle Singles, Jennings' stories introduced readers to the brilliant and terrifying assassin Villanelle and the intelligence officer obsessed with tracking her down, Eve Polastri. The books quickly attracted attention and were adapted for television by acclaimed writer and creator Phoebe Waller-Bridge. What followed was one of the most successful British television dramas of recent years.
    Starring Jodie Comer and Sandra Oh, Killing Eve became a worldwide hit, winning major awards and earning a devoted international following. Jennings has described the experience of watching his creation evolve from a self-published passion project into a cultural phenomenon as both surreal and deeply rewarding.
    His latest book is Killing Eve: Medusa available now - yes Oksana and Eve live on....
    Long before Villanelle arrived on our screens, Luke had established himself as one of Britain's most respected journalists and critics. He wrote for The Observer, Vanity Fair and The New Yorker, developing a reputation for sharp observation, stylish prose and a fascination with extraordinary people and hidden worlds.
    His novels include the Booker Prize-nominated Atlantic, as well as a wide range of fiction and non-fiction exploring subjects as varied as espionage, performance, identity, adventure and human obsession. Alongside his writing, he has also been recognised as one of Britain's leading dance critics - having trained as a ballet dancer - bringing the same insight and storytelling ability to the arts as he does to fiction.
    Today, Luke continues to write, with the world of Villanelle still evolving on the page long after the television series ended. His work combines literary craftsmanship with page-turning storytelling, creating characters who are intelligent, flawed, dangerous and unforgettable.
    From self-publishing a series of short novellas to inspiring one of the most talked-about television dramas of the 21st century, Luke Jennings' career is a reminder that sometimes the biggest stories begin in the most unexpected places.

    Key Points of the Episode:

    Why he self published his new book and how it was noticed by the right person and became a global phenomenon.
    The tricky, clunky part of publishing and how the market is different
    Some of the characters in the book (and who they are a bit like in the real world!)
    The exciting plotliines discussed.
    The momentum of his success!
    The best way to do business meetings!
    Where to find the book.
    His books are available on Boldwood Books and Amazon

    Support the show
    Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

    You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

    On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/
  • How to have Extraordinary Relationships

    From 60 to 20; How to Defy Aging- with Sandra Parsons- S5 E60

    09/06/2026 | 53 mins.
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    Sandra Parsons is a British journalist, editor, author, and qualified yoga instructor best known for her wellness and longevity work, including the book Age Less and the “Ageless Method.” Formerly an editor at The Times, Sandra combines personal experience with modern health science to explore ageing, wellbeing, and lifestyle transformation. After overcoming serious health challenges, she developed a practical approach focused on nutrition, movement, rest, and mindset, aiming to help people improve both vitality and longevity. 
    Her incredible biological age
    What finally pushed her to change
    The research she has studied
    The incredible results of it.
    Why smoking is still seen as "cool"
    How she began to look and feel so much better.
    Why she (for good reasons) felt she had to carry on working despite not feeling good.
    The amazing - and most importantly doable discoveries from leading edge science.
    Seriously... easy and doable!
    The amazing benefits of fibre, and how it can help us.
    Where to find fibre easily.
    (Would you believe fibre is in raspberries?)
    Small changes is the key....
    ....and what they lead to.
    You can find Sandra on Insta
    Or.. Grab the book!

    Support the show
    Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

    You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

    On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/
  • How to have Extraordinary Relationships

    Bad Maps and Good Intentions; Sophie Radice on the trials and tribulations of life beyond the comfort zone S5 E11

    26/05/2026 | 57 mins.
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    On this episode, writer and human rights campaigner Sophie Radice talks about many issues that need a deeper conversation; xenophobia, travel vs escape, identity and how she ended up on court after working in the Jungle in Calais.
    Her latest novel, The Year of Bad Maps, is a deeply personal and politically resonant story inspired by her solo travels across ten countries and her experiences surrounding the Calais refugee camps, being arrested and put on trial. Blending wit, travel writing and contemporary politics, the novel explores themes of migration, motherhood, friendship, ageism and xenophobia, while asking challenging questions about why movement is romanticised for tourists but criminalised for refugees. The book has been praised for tackling difficult political themes with warmth, humour and humanity rather than polemic.
    She is a British journalist, novelist and human rights campaigner whose work spans literature, politics, journalism and social justice. Over the course of a varied career, she has written for major publications including The Guardian, The Observer, The Independent, Vogue and The Sunday Times, developing a reputation for intelligent, compassionate writing that often explores identity, inequality and the human stories behind political issues. 
    Alongside her journalism, Radice has spent more than two decades working in communications and campaigning roles for organisations focused on refugee rights, women’s rights and humanitarian issues. She has worked on campaigns involving immigration detention, wrongful convictions and violence against women, and has collaborated with NGOs both in the UK and internationally, including projects in Sierra Leone. She currently works with the United Nations Association UK as Head of Campaigns. 
    Radice is also an accomplished novelist. Her debut novel, The Henry Experiment, received critical praise for its sharp psychological insight and was later adapted into a BBC drama. Her writing is known for combining humour, emotional intelligence and social commentary, often examining the tensions between personal freedom, morality and modern society. 
    Key points of the interview:
    How she wrote her book about her year off from the point of view of her guides.
    How her adventure was incredible....
    .....but ended up facing a 5 year prison sentence.
    The easy emotional bonds she forms with people.
    Reminiscing on some amazing memories.
    Dealing with peoples distress who are escaping bad situations elsewhere in the world, and being treated badly here.
    The questionable meetings she had in Goa, and how she was advised not to travel alone.
    How freeing it was travelling alone.
    How the wanderlust did not satisfy her.
    What she learned about herself.
    The place she visited that was the most challenging and why.
    Many profound moments.
    The court case and what she was arrested for.
    The court case outcome
    Get the book here "The Year of Bad Maps"
    Support the show
    Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

    You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

    On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/
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About How to have Extraordinary Relationships
Well we have all wondered about it haven't we?And "Relationship" is a big word. Because if you think about it, we all have a relationship with everything don't we?Join us for fun facts, deep dives and every conceivable mind broadening angle of relationships.Reach out to Lucy on www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com
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