How to have Extraordinary Relationships

On this week's How To Have Extraordinary Relationships, I talk to 'Victoria' about what happened when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She generously offered to come on the show for many reasons; one was to help other people who have cancer and also those around them but the other one is to talk about what many people fear; what do you do when you are told you have a major illness that will involve difficult decisions, surgery, chemo, pain etc and you are alone?
She is talking to me anonymously so that she can feel free to talk about everything with deep honesty.
When she was diagnosed with breast cancer, her world shifted overnight. Without a partner or close support network around her, she faced the long road of treatment largely on her own, navigating hospital appointments, difficult decisions, and the emotional weight that comes with serious illness.
Through surgery, treatment, and recovery, Victoria showed extraordinary courage. She learned to advocate for herself, to sit with uncertainty, and to find moments of light even in the hardest days. Her journey was not just about surviving illness, but about rediscovering her own strength and independence.
However it is also about how do you cope when there is no one there for you? It led Victoria to ask herself some various and serious questions; why did she not feel able to ask for help? Why did people not step up for her?
She came home, finally, after the end of reconstructive surgery, rounds of gruelling chemo, many night spent tried and alone - there was no party for her, no balloons, nothing (unlike many of the other patients she had met along the way)
This led her to take a long, hard, uncomfortable look at herself.....
Today, Victoria’s story is one of perseverance and quiet bravery, offering hope to others who may feel alone in their own battles.
But it is also a story of how we need people and find the courage to be vulnerable so that people CAN help us
Key points of the episode:
How the fact that she was alone (but with a full life) and how that became a key part of the story.
How deep down she did want to meet someone, but it was not her priority.
How she did not think in any way she was a candidate to getting cancer.
How she was getting shooting pains in her breast which was not a typical symptom of cancer.
The unpleasant tests, and the shock of the diagnosis.
How the mammogram originally came up clear.
The very invasive operation she had.....
Why the word cancer was understandably emotive for her.
How she handled most of it alone
How she has learned that the path is not linear.
How she processed her emotions.
How she could not plan (which is out of character) as the treatment path is not linear.
The financial difficulties she experienced.
The ongoing treatment she needed
How brilliant the medical team was- physically, but mental healthcare is needed.
How she felt about future physical intimacy.
Her life now, and what she is about.
Support the show
Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/

Melissa Jones is a British novelist, journalist and non-fiction writer known for her intelligent, psychologically rich storytelling. Born in London and educated at Oxford, she began her career in television and journalism before turning to fiction. 
Her novels often explore complex emotional landscapes and moral ambiguity, with notable works including Cold in Earth, Sick at Heart, and The Hidden Heart of Emily Hudson. 
Jones has built a reputation for elegant prose and dark, compelling narratives that linger like a half-remembered dream… the kind that taps you on the shoulder at 3am and says, “We’re not done yet.”
About Her New Book: Gone For A Soldier
Published in 2026, Gone For A Soldier is a gripping psychological mystery that dives headfirst into the slippery nature of truth and trust. 
The story follows Maddie, a former writer turned teacher, who claims she has killed a man… except there’s no body, no record of the victim, and possibly no truth in anything she’s been told. As reality begins to wobble like a dodgy pub table, the novel explores deception, identity, and how easily we can hand our sanity over to the wrong person. 
Dark, unsettling, and quietly explosive, it’s less “whodunnit” and more “what on earth is going on here?” — a psychological maze where every answer raises a more troubling question.
Key points of the episode:
An elevator speech for her own book.
How close it is to her autobiography!
A discourse on the writing style and how hard is it to create.
Female intuition and how it starts early.
How long the book took and why.
How the novel covers dangerous relationships and the patterns behind them.
A highly original take on a launch
The unexpected joy of teaching.
How writing is in the family.
How you can get the book.
Get in touch: 
Support the show
Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/

A woman in love. A devastating break-up and heartbreak.
And a dog that in his own naughty way kind of saved the day....

Sophia Money-Coutts is a British journalist, columnist, and bestselling author known for her witty, modern takes on relationships, manners, and contemporary life. Born in 1985 into the historic Money-Coutts banking family, she was educated at the London School of Economics, where she studied History. 

She began her career in journalism, working for publications including the Evening Standard, Daily Mail, and Tatler, where she spent several years as Features Director, immersing herself in Britain’s high society.  She has since become a prominent columnist, writing regularly for The Daily Telegraph and contributing to a range of international outlets, as well as appearing on TV and radio. 

Alongside her journalism, Money-Coutts is a successful novelist, credited with helping revive the modern romantic comedy genre. Her books include The Plus One, What Happens Now?, The Wish List, Did You Miss Me?, Looking Out for Love, and The Right Place, as well as the memoir The Year of the Dog.  Her writing is known for its humour, sharp observation, and candid exploration of dating, friendship, and modern adulthood.

With a distinctive voice that blends wit with self-aware charm, Sophia Money-Coutts has carved out a niche as both a social commentator and storyteller, bringing a light, irreverent touch to the realities of contemporary life.

Key Points of the Episode:

How she was abruptly left "holding the puppy" in a relationship.
How she began to wonder what was wrong with her.
Dennis (the dog) and his regular escapades.
Why Dennis actually helped her at a critical time (in hindsight)
The big romantic road trip (with Dennis)
How she is a blend of conventional and unconventional.

Check her out on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sophiamcoutts/
And Substack: https://sophiamoneycoutts.substack.com/
And for ger books Google "Amazon Sophia Money-Coutts"

Key points of the episode:
Her book "The Year of the Dog"
The kind of dog she has and his personality.
How she met Mike and fell in love - in the setting of Crystal Palace.
Her work as a successful journalist and author.
How she felt that parenthood and marriage would not happen to her.
Why she realised that in hindsight (after therapy) the relationship would not have worked.
How she is very happy now "bumbling around" with her dog.
Some of the naughty behaviours that Parsons Terriers are know for..
How she focusses on humour in her journalism.
Check her out:
www.instagram.com/sophiamcoutts
https://sophiamoneycoutts.substack.com

Support the show
Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/

Dr Lucy Pollock is a British consultant geriatrician celebrated for her clear-eyed, compassionate approach to ageing and end-of-life care. With decades of experience in the NHS, she has guided countless patients and families through the often complex, emotional decisions that come with growing older.
She is the author of The Book About Getting Older, a candid and reassuring guide that demystifies later life, and The Golden Rule, in which she explores the ethical and human dilemmas of modern medicine with warmth, wisdom, and honesty. Across both books, Dr Pollock challenges the idea that medicine should always prolong life at any cost, instead championing dignity, autonomy, and meaningful conversations about what really matters.
Respected for her humanity as much as her expertise, she has become a trusted voice in reshaping how we think about ageing, care, and the choices that define a good life.

Key Points of the Episode:
A summary of her two successful books and how they came about.
Her manifesto for change and better care for the elderly.
The shocking statistic on medication and its problems.
The key traits of great geriatric carers.
"Upward Helicopter" care and the issues with it.
The mistakes some doctors make. (from a place of love)
Her short experience as a surgeon.
The game changing advice that sealed her professional direction.
Her experience of a "normal" childhood in Ireland.
Her thoughts of AI in medicine.
How we are not quite as good at longevity as we thought we are.
The history of elderly care since WW2.
The sad case of waste in healthcare.
Her thoughts on preventative medicine.
What elderly people have learned about life.
Her fascinating thoughts on assisted dying.
....and her thoughts on unassisted dying.

Links to her two books here:
The Book of Getting Older
The Golden Rule

Support the show
Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/

Dr Lucy Pollock is a British consultant geriatrician celebrated for her clear-eyed, compassionate approach to ageing and end-of-life care. With decades of experience in the NHS, she has guided countless patients and families through the often complex, emotional decisions that come with growing older.
She is the author of The Book About Getting Older, a candid and reassuring guide that demystifies later life, and The Golden Rule, in which she explores the ethical and human dilemmas of modern medicine with warmth, wisdom, and honesty. Across both books, Dr Pollock challenges the idea that medicine should always prolong life at any cost, instead championing dignity, autonomy, and meaningful conversations about what really matters.
Respected for her humanity as much as her expertise, she has become a trusted voice in reshaping how we think about ageing, care, and the choices that define a good life.

Key Points of the Episode:
A summary of her two successful books and how they came about.
Her manifesto for change and better care for the elderly.
The shocking statistic on medication and its problems.
The key traits of great geriatric carers.
"Upward Helicopter" care and the issues with it.
The mistakes some doctors make. (from a place of love)
Her short experience as a surgeon.
The game changing advice that sealed her professional direction.
Her experience of a "normal" childhood in Ireland.
Her thoughts of AI in medicine.
How we are not quite as good at longevity as we thought we are.
The history of elderly care since WW2.
The sad case of waste in healthcare.
Her thoughts on preventative medicine.
What elderly people have learned about life.
Her fascinating thoughts on assisted dying.
....and her thoughts on unassisted dying.

Links to her two books here:
The Book of Getting Older
The Golden Rule

Support the show
Has this podcast inspired you and would you like to learn more?

You can reach out to Lucy, love coach, relationship counsellor, couples counsellor extraordinaire and author of "How to have extraordinary relationships with absolutely everybody".....

On:http://www.lucycavendishlovecoach.com/