Don’t Scare the Newbies!

This week’s guests are Duncan, one of the founders of Newcastle Leathermen, and Tea, a bootblack and Newcastle Leathermen’s first nonbinary member. Plus Tea’s partner popping in with an occasional comment! O/our guests share the power of community, culture differences between Leather communities and the Fetlife-based kink scene, visibility and how Newcastle Leathermen navigate venues and social media, bootblacking and why this role is so valued, and an overview of Leather history and its impact.
Find out more about Newcastle Leathermen at https://www.newcastleleathermen.com/
Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials and O/our merch at www.kirizal.com
Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies

This week, kirizal and S are chatting about sexual orientation - from O/our coming out stories (one at 14, and one at 41!), kirizal’s multiple coming outs and the pan vs bi distinction, T4T dating, and whether O/our kink identities are a part of sexual orientation for U/us. Plus - outsourcing the terrifying task of talking to women, hot takes from S and the usual soapbox moments from kirizal.
Content Note: Discussions of homophobia and biphobia
Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials and O/our merch at www.kirizal.com
Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies

Adult babies Jen and Tealeaves sat down with kirizal and S this week to share their experiences - through all the noise of stigma and misconceptions, they share the authenticity and joy of little space, kink as a core part of identity, the intimacy of vulnerability, and lots more. Plus - censorship and recent legal challenges, a fascinating diversion into inducing lactation, and Jen's plans to make an ABDL romcom (W/we are already so sat - someone please, fund it!).
Content Note: Detailed discussion of diaper wearing and use, kinkshaming and stigma, and some conversation about misogyny and transphobia as elements of kink play.
Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials and O/our merch at www.kirizal.com
Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies
And visit @Tealeaves_ on Fetlife, and @Jenby_Doll on Fetlife and X Videos

It's Pride Month, so in the first of O/our queer focused episodes kirizal and S jump straight in with the annual discourse topic, does kink belong at Pride? W/we also chat about O/our first Prides, the commercialisation and coorporate involvement in Pride season, bystander consent, children and families at Pride, purity culture and the very British fear of acknowleding sex, and lots more! kirizal also manages to make S feel "a bit sick" which, given some of the stuff that they say on a regular basis, is quite impressive.
There's a bit of a hum in the background of part of this one - mainly at the start and fades pretty quick once it gets going - once again technology has been vexing U/us. Apologies!
Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials plus O/our merch at www.kirizal.com
Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies

After the S-heavy long distance episode, W/we thought it was kirizal's turn to have the spotlight and dive into one of their specialist topics - addiction and recovery. kirizal spent most of their 20s battling mental health issues which spiralled into drug dependency and a crisis that almost cost them their life. In this episode W/we talk about that journey through into recovery, unmasking the darker side of 12 step programs, and kirizal's post-recovery life and the shift to a recovery-capital based moderation approach. But what does that have to do with kink? W/we talk about pleasure-seeking as a coping mechanism, neurodiversity crossovers, self-medicating of shame, and the complex relationship people can have with control and surrender. Plus, at the centre of it all connection - the healing power of community.
Content Note: This is an emotional one - detailed discussion of drug use including intravenous drug use, overdose, suicide attempt, suicide, pet death, transphobia, shame, "13th stepping" sexual abuse, domestic violence and sexual assault within 12 step groups.
Follow kirizal’s blog and find all their socials at www.kirizal.com
Support U/us on Patreon at patreon.com/dontscarethenewbies